Expatriates in Trinidad and Tobago


Made in USA

I have been working now and then with expatriate (expat) engineers with many foreign accents in Trinidad and Tobago for several years and the one thing I can say about these mostly male engineers is that they experience Trini culture and women to the fullest. I am not sure how truthful these expats are but most say they are either divorced or single and I suppose that’s why they can safely work away from home with a local woman for so long.


Trinidad Barbecue Chicken

Locals think of expats as those foreigners who build something in Pt. Lisas while shacking up with bar girls in an apartment in Westmoorings. The public even feel expats leave their mark in more places than the Industrial Estates in the form of children who resemble but are forgotten by them. I can’t say for sure about expats leaving their mark in that way in modern Trinidad and Tobago as Trini women are not easy to fool or forget since our girls are educated and look at plenty cable TV. I get the impression expats see local women as one reason for enduring the constant threat of bullet or stab wounds in guarded condos in Westmoorings. Only a few years ago, when there were tonnes of Irish men in Trinidad and Tobago, our country lost some good women through love and migration to these Guinness-drinking, party maniacs. The Irish presence now seems to be down to a trickle.


Local Dasani Water

Expats are not always a bad influence as they are largely responsible for the steak and beer sections in Westmooring’s Hi-Lo and the Trojan and sex-toy section in Westmooring’s SuperPharm. Our local Expats love bottled water because they were taught in Expat School that the locals know as much as US citizens about clean running water. Because they speak with foreign accents, expats are considered by locals to be experts in their field but this typically turns out to be not so and most are just ordinary engineers cloaking their stupidity with foreign accents and local girls in short skirts.

It is a fact we need some foreign staff in Trinidad and Tobago to build aluminum, ammonia, urea, and methanol plants, but we would prefer competent expats rather than ones sent for cosmetic reasons, only sucking up local resources and women.

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Hello Money, Money, Money

trinidad and tobago money_550Dear aka_lol,

You have just been awarded, £750,000,00 GBP in the TOYODA AWARD, send us your info for claims



Soon, very, very soon aka would be saying good bye to all the small and poor people, and hello to the big and better people. My luck has finally changed and it had to do more with saying the right prayer in the right way than getting something from a government contract from an undisclosed contact. My wealth will not be based on raiding casino vaults or the bribing of officials to allow my shipments through. My wealth will not even come from laundering with a grocery or stabbing for a Blackberry. My wealth will come from above via Gmail.

Now that I almost have the wealth I can look for a high-rise apartment in Miami since nobody with any sense and money want to live in this hell-hole, especially if you win a lottery or into big robbery. I now know what it feels like to be rich – independent of this land of Commission of Enquiry. Now that I have some money I could set up a little company and rub the bigwigs’ shoulders. I have to let them know my one-day-old company could build box drain, cut grass and build overpass. This will be just the foreplay before I screw the country. So what if people live in water in a shed. Is it my fault they poor and live to dead?  Well, ok, maybe one day I will give the poor a little thing but only if ah sure God looking.

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Portrait of a Puppy

Brownie, through the eyes of a Pentax

Brownie, through the eyes of a Pentax

Two month-old Brownie looks at the photographer and wonders why a Pentax and not a Nikon or Canon. Though everything is new to Brownie she is already like most of the world and thinks in terms of  Nikon and Canon, not Pentax and only occasionally Olympus and Sony (formerly Minolta). Like most of the planet, Brownie’s mind is shaped by ads, product placement in movies and hearsay, not on the truth about glass , dynamic range or water proof seals.

But for a moment she forgets the commercial world of cameras as she sees  the photographer is using a Pentax smc P-FA 50mm 1:1.4 lens . Brownie is now more interested in what f-stop the lens is set. She is relieved to learn it’s f4.5 so her pose lasting 1/60th of a second, an eternity in a puppy’s life, might not have been wasted.

Is her portrait underexposed, she wonders. Could it have been sharper? Is it JPG or RAW? Why no tripod? She is asking the questions of the innocent but will soon learn photography is like life where there are so many questions and no right answers, only possibilities.

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An Interview with Chennette

chennette-600Check out  Chennette’s interview on Amazing Trinidad Vacations. Chennett has developed the tasty and unique blog, Lifespan of a Chennette, with recipes, comments, and photographs about mainly local and Caribbean food. Chennette also includes foreign foods she experienced on her frequent travels to far off lands such as Turkey, Barbados and Grenada. According to Chennette she is “a Trini currently living and working in Guyana, with the good fortune of being able to hop around some of the beautiful places in the Caribbean, all the while learning how to use my camera.”

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Producing Productivity in Trinidad and Tobago

productivity-chartProductivity – A country’s productivity is usually measured by the country’s GDP per hours worked.

GDP – Measuring GDP is complicated (which is why we leave it to the economists), but at its most basic, the calculation can be done in one of two ways: either by adding up what everyone earned in a year (income approach), or by adding up what everyone spent (expenditure method). Logically, both measures should arrive at roughly the same total. ~ Investopedia

Productivity isn’t everything but in the end it is almost everything. A country’s ability to improve its standard of living over time depends almost entirely on its ability to raise its output per worker. ~ Paul Krugman

Short skirts in the workplace has been shown to boost productivity by boosting attendance. ~ aka_lol

productivity cartoonPrime Minister Patrick Manning said the country’s productivity has been falling for the last five years and though I didn’t have the figures to prove it I had a gut feeling it was so since everybody I knew was either stuck in traffic or flood during productive times.  The Prime Minister is saying we citizens were being paid more and more over those five years but we produced less and less. I feel a sense of shame because of this. What The Prime Minister didn’t say was people were being paid more and more for one of several reasons –  to avoid starvation due to inflation, to go apartment shopping in Miami or to help win elections. The Prime Minister also said in his speech to launch the Productivity Council that citizens must work harder and come to work on time – the answers are always so simple.

productivitySo we need to produce more corn curls, Crix and painted stones (aka GDP) per man per hour.  How we in Trinidad and Tobago achieve more productivity will not be easy since UDECOTT is already spending efficiently and the new helicopters will produce more than just dust in we face. The Parliamentarians are taking the lead and agreed to a much deserved wage freeze but will produce more hot air in return. All these efforts must be commended but I am mostly hoping the 15-man Productivity Council has enough productive members to produce a productive report worth producing at a competitive price.

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Venezuela Wins Miss Universe While Other Countries Blog

Stefania Fernandez - Miss Universe 2009

Stefania Fernandez - Miss Universe 2009

If you see one Miss Venezuela, you have seen a future Miss Universe. I am not saying Venezuelan beauties are superior since I prefer Colombians and Trinis but Venezuela is a country that not only has many nationals now living in Trinidad because of Chavez but Venezuela takes the sport of competitive beauty to a new level. Venezuela is to beauty what Jamaica is to track and field.

Stefania Fernandez -1Miss Venezuela, Stefania Fernandez, was crowned Miss Universe yesterday and she took over from former Miss Venezuela and 2008 Miss Universe, Dayana Mendoza.  That means Miss Venezuela won the Miss Universe Competition two years straight. Naturally, some people said the judges were biased and by Venezuela wining two years in a row it makes the competition more blogable and hence more popular. The popularity of events and celebrities are now being rated by the amount of blog space they occupy rather than those transient TV ratings. By Venezuela winning for two consecutive years it  makes it less likely Miss Venezuela will win in 2010. I am sorry for the next Miss Venezuela.

Gabrielle Walcott Miss Trinidad and Tobago

Gabrielle Walcott Miss Trinidad and Tobago2008 entrant in the Miss World pageant placed as the 2nd runner-up

I didn’t look at the Miss Universe competition because I am protesting Trinidad and Tobago’s inability to send a contestant to the competition this year. This is a serious issue and I think we have a very unpatriotic private sector that mainly makes money from importing items in 40-foot containers then selling these items at a markup. The private sector in Trinidad and Tobago cannot be considered creative or even smart since they don’t understand sponsoring beauty is like sponsoring natural gas – a natural resource.  Maybe the private sector is reeling for the recession or from buying houses in Miami but I still consider most of private sector companies unpatriotic but not all. I am not saying the government should take over the funding of the competition since that would give the competition a political slant locally. We could do without politicizing the one beautiful thing left in the country, beautiful women.

Valene Maharaj - Miss Trinidad and Tobago World 2007 title holder, and Miss World of the Caribbean for 2007

Valene Maharaj - Miss Trinidad and Tobago World 2007 title holder, and Miss World of the Caribbean for 2007

Trinidad and Tobago will do well to remember that Venezuela is obsessed with beauty and understand that natural talent can only get you so far and to go further a competitive beauty must be literally sculpted to perfection. Being born with a good butt or ample bosoms is not enough anymore and you also have to train your body parts to walk on stage without showing nerves. Forget what token  question they ask at the end since looking good trumps intelligence every day.

With every generation the beauty of a nation increases as more and more beautiful people are linking up via Internet Chat rooms and Carnivals bands. Surely there will come a time when human beauty will be saturated and perfection would have been reached. I think we are far from that time since less attractive people are still mating with each other due to the abundance of cheap beer and poor lighting at fetes.

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Time Traveler’s Wife – A Male Butt Movie

The-Time-Travelers-Wife-eric-bana-2695338-1500-1000Some might say Time Traveler’s Wife is a Chick Flick since is contains more male nudity than any movie in my recent memory. The reason for the mostly backside male nudity has to do with the fact that people can travel back and forth in time but not their clothes. This quirk makes it embarrassing for the time traveler when he arrives at some random destination at some random time; usually near a clothes store. For this reason I don’t recommend women pick up time travel even as a hobby since women are fussier about clothes than men.

Time travel at random and unpredictable times makes for a mushy love story with some blood and minor sex scenes. Time Travelers Wife (formerly a book) is also a movie containing good looking actresses and actors, Rachel McAdams and Eric Bana. Beauty had to be an important part of this movie because love stories with ugly people are on their way out since there is too much ugliness in the world and on the streets as it is. It’s hard to say if the Time Traveler’s wife is a tear-jerker but at Movietowne the lights went on later than normal at the end  so I couldn’t say for sure. I heard some coughing  but that might be mostly people trying to finish their popcorn.

Yes, I would recommend you go see Time Travelers Wife if you are a guy with the need to impress a chick and she will be impressed if she goes with you. You will not only impress her it will give her a famous butt she can compare your sorry butt to. Rachel McAdams‘s butt wasn’t too bad either.

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