Form: The management and staff (one and the same) of This Beach Called Life
To: All those who managed to come visit this blog at random intervals during the last 12 months – have a Sexy Christmas and may the stockings, g-strings and/or Speedos that you bought fit that special someone almost as well as it did the mannequin and/or sales person in the store. May your tingles be in the right place and be bright and cheery.
Here is another photo-project which I am calling “Trini Christmas.” I will start with a few photos and as I find more time I will take and post more shots. The photos shown are some of what I observed during this Christmas season. Christmas in Trinidad has a high content of foreign decorations, foreign movies and local pigs. None of this is a criticism since nearly everybody is happy with what we do during the Christmas season with the one exception being dying and killing with drinking and driving. Local Christmas music is mainly the Spanish influenced Parang, White Christmas and Scrunter wanting A Piece of Pork for the Christmas. Sorrel is the most popular drink in Trinidad and Tobago at Christmas time after Scotch and coconut water. Sorrel drink is made from the fleshy red calyx of the hibiscus sabdariffa (ttltt.com). Ginger beer is popular but not something I am fond off so I will not try to big it up via blog.
There are several new trends developing over the years in Trinidad and Tobago for the Christmas Season such as avoiding the malls and streets and instead depending on Amazon and skybox addresses for everything from books to underwear for that special someone. There are now a number of these skybox services available in Trinidad and Tobago, services that can easily frustrate customers with unreliable delivery during this season of buying affection with credit cards.
The best way to describe the weather in Trinidad in December is tropically cool. Only last week I heard thunder then got soaked but generally the skies are sometimes blue and even bluer if a polarizing filter is used – no Photoshop is necessary for the season.
Christmas time is the best time of the year in TnT for those who have some money. Even if a person fell through the cracks and was never able to make any money because they lacked the skills and health necessary to get a job and live like people, there might be short-term charity made available by the rich and the Government. Nobody wants to be poor and in an attempt to combat poverty and unhappiness some public servants, politicians, and contractors team up to dabble in the corruption field at the expense of even those who don’t have any money.
Port of Spain was one of the eleven cities that was named by John Lennon and Yoko Ono in their 1969 antiwar drive called “The War is Over.” Their friend in Trinidad and Tobago was the infamous Michael X aka Michael Abdul Malik aka Abdul Malik. The song Happy Xmas (War Is Over) was written by John Lennon in 1971 and has become a Christmas classic. If you want to see the harsh realities of war done to the music of John Lennon click here (embedding disabled by request).
According to Wikipedia “Following the impact of “Give Peace a Chance” and “Happy Xmas (War is Over)“, both strongly associated with the anti-Vietnam-War movement, the Nixon administration, hearing rumours of Lennon’s involvement in a concert to be held in San Diego at the same time as the Republican National Convention, tried to have him deported. Nixon believed that Lennon’s anti-war activities could cost him his re-election; Republican Senator Strom Thurmond suggested in a February 1972 memo that “deportation would be a strategic counter-measure” against Lennon.” Some of the intrigue concerning this fear of Lennon by the US Government can be seen in the 2006 documentary The U.S. vs. John Lennon. For some intrigue into Michael Abdul Malick see the movie The Bank Job.
It may be green but it is not for novices
Most men find Christmas gift giving for women to be a pain in the butt cheeks since it has become nearly impossible for men to know what women really want irregardless of what women say they want or how much men spend on them. I have thought long and hard about this problem and realize that spending too much creates bad habits and sends the wrong signals to the bank thus the solution is not in the amount of money but in the cleverness of the thoughts behind the gifts. In an attempt to unravel the mystery of women gift-giving on the cheap without looking so, I make the following win-win suggestions hoping it will help the confused man score big on a budget this Christmas.
a.) If you want the woman in your life to make you happy I recommend the stable Better Homes and Gardens New Cook Book, 15th Edition together with the exciting Naughty Net Micro G-String. The cost of the two items together will not break even a pauper’s piggy bank but will bring mammoth joy to the world of the better women and all men. The gift combo is known as the shake and bake solution.
Bedtime reading for the woman in your life
b.) For men who are a bit less selfish, the woman in your life who enjoys a good book will appreciate Sexy Hot Tales: Selected Erotic Stories by Anonymous Authors and Barbara Hot. It may give her some creative ideas on how best to use the man in her life for things other than simple plumbing jobs. If she is into photography The Mammoth Book of New Erotic Photography by Maxim Jakubowski is not funny but may help tickle her pink if you are a failure at it.
c.) If the woman in your life is struggling with losing a few extra pounds and needs some motivation I highly recommend you ditch those fad diet books and instead buy a copy of Sports Illustrated Swimsuit Portfolio: The Explorers Edition.
Illustrated for men but useful to women
To use as a weight-loss guide you, the smart man in her life, should constantly look through the book and circle here and there as if you intend to order something. For obvious reasons, make sure she sees you circling and drooling but use a bib. This method has been known to cause women to do what ever it takes to lose those extra unwanted pounds that separate them from looking like a Sports Illustrated pinup girl with sunken eyes and breast. She may seem annoyed at first and the method on the surface may appear unkind but she will thank you later if you survive the ordeal.
Christmas morning in St. Augustine, Trinidad and Tobago - 2009
This is my 0ne thousand words for Christmas in Trinidad and Tobago.
I don’t know if this year will be different for Santa but for many years he has been discriminating when giving gifts. For years, Santa has been giving rich children things like laptops, Wii and Playstation 3, but he gives the poor ones imitation designer tee-shirts and one extra slice of ham in their hops only in times of an economic boom. Many times Santa completely avoids poor neighborhoods citing crime and his subjective opinion of goodness.
Once again, this year, the North American Aerospace Command (NORAD) is tracking Santa from the time he leaves the North Pole. I am not sure why NORAD wants to track Santa, since I doubt it would influence his bias towards the rich. NORAD probably wants to be sure Santa doesn’t create an international incident by dropping toys for English-speaking children with worded instructions.
When it comes to giving gifts the concept of it is the thought that counts is crap. That idea has outlived its usefulness since the Trojans and in today’s materialistic world, money is much better than making love. Thoughts come easy and to some, a little too easy that is why when it comes to giving, nobody really cares what you think. But even with money and Amazon reviews, choosing the right gift can be a problem and it’s still too easy to buy expensive junk because China commissions one coal-fired power station every week to supply electricity to factories making Christmas gifts for the world. Since advice on gift buying at Christmas time is as useful as a smashed car windscreen, I decided to add my advice to the list.
FOR YOUR MAN
For the man who has everything including an ornamental girlfriend or wife, I would recommend the Leica S-System’s Interchangeable Lens Camera with 3 inch LCD with Sapphire LCD Cover Glass and Platinum Service Package. If your man thinks he is serious about photography and has outgrown making sex tapes, then the Leica S2, which can be pre-ordered at Amazon for US$27, 995 plus shipping, is the gift to get. Naturally, you will have to order a lens or lenses separately and prices range from around US$5,000 to God knows how much. Always remember, if you give a Leica S2 with lens, hopefully you won’t have to give much else until Boxing Day at night.
FOR YOUR WOMAN
For the Woman who is anxious to please you instead of cook and clean, there is not much to think about. Instead of giving the woman in your life a reason to chase after you with a golf club in the wee hours of the morning because you transgressed with a cocktail waitress, I recommend something that can be used to prevent, or minimize further transgressions – the Victoria Secret Sexy Little Things® NEW! Lace-up thong. It looks like, and sells for next to nothing so you will not regret it as it is also easy to wrap and stuff in your back pocket in cases of emergency.