Serena Williams’ Sexy New Video Game Ad Pulled


Serena Williams Top Spin

A good ad agency knows what will offend the pretentious so it is not surprising that this Serena Williams ad for the video game Top Spin was considered “too risqué for television.” That television would be American TV and obviously not Trinidad and Tobago TV which is accustomed to showing all forms of gyrations without even breaking a sweat or receiving a complaint except that the video was too short, or the skirt too long.

The Top Spin ad, I suppose,stressed too much on  the behind the scenes attractions of tennis instead of the boring part of the game which is as bland as dry toast in prison.  I admire the ad agency not only for a well made video that holds the attention as much as anything on Playboy TV but in also understanding that to offend is sometimes necessary to succeed in a world where commercial success is usually driven by sex.

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Latoya Woods Topless


La Toya Woods topless

It was bound to happen, just a matter of time. The Miss Universe franchise has decided to tackle the years of falling ratings because of stiff competition from Internet porn and Facebook by offering fans and well wishers topless photos of willing contestants who understand that “leaked” sex tapes can get out of hand especially if the lighting is poor and the sex is boring.

It is my understanding from an Indonesian website that Miss Trinidad and Tobago, La Toya Woods, decided to pose topless for official photographers. This topless photo shoot was done, I suppose, to fast track Miss Woods’ career in the dog-eat-dog-and-cat world of competitive beauty. With the local economy being what it is, I believe Miss Woods’ decision to show more of her assets internationally than other contestants will pay off while she is still on the perky side. Strike while the iron is hot is always good advice.

Check out news  here.

Latoya Woods topless

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Here is a translation from Indonesian to English from http://cybertainment.cbn.net.id

Not only selebritis hollywood that dared to pose topless in covers of the magazine, the contestants Miss Universe 2010 then did not hesitate to pose topless when carrying out the process of photography for the contestants in Las Vegas, the United States on the Monday (9/8) then. One of them among them that is the contestant from Trinidad & Tobago, La Toya Woods. As being quoted by Access Hollywood, on last Tuesday (10/8), the contestant from Trinidad & Tobagi, La Toya Woods quite deliberate chose topless when being photographed. That the implementation of the reason La Toya Woods wanted to steal attention of the crowd. This my body and I was free to carry out any for my body, said La Toya Woods to the media.

Latoya Woods

Latoya Woods - Official Miss Universe Photo

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Porn in 3D


3D movies are the latest craze to hit the planet with nearly every new, big-budget, special effect movie like Avatar, Toy Story 3 and The Last Airbender hitting the screens in this not so new, lifelike format. Audiences have been lapping up 3D offerings and only a few have been complaining of headaches and nausea while wearing those obnoxious, reusable, germ-filled 3D glasses that smell like an old hotdog. 3D is now available in your home but only if you have inherited a fortune or was into government corruption. Every component needed to view 3D movies at home such as 3D Blu-Ray players, 3D-flat screen TVs and battery operated 3D glasses appeared to be priced to cause permanent poverty but prices are expected to come down as the 3D industry milk those impatient early adopters dry. Recently, the World Cup was shown in the US on a pay-per-view channel in 3D and more 3D channels are planned.

What the industry has been silently active about is what I consider the best use of 3D technology so far and that is 3D porn. 3D makes the images on the screen come to life as the brain is tricked into believing things are in one’s lap. What could be better to propel the porn movie industry than a lap dance on the screen that sends one’s pulse rate from resting to unsafe in one second? 3D technology was meant to make people happier so it is only a matter of time before the entire adult industry goes from boringly flat to nicely protruding.

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Sasha Grey – Porn Actress Extraordinaire


sasha_grey

Sasha Grey

Sasha Grey is hailed as one of the most popular and talented porn stars today. She is 21 years old and has so far starred in 189 adult films. She has won 8 Adult movie awards including the prestigious AVN Best Three-Way Sex Scene (2007) (along with two others, naturally) and Best Oral Sex Scene (2008) – I am sure you, dear reader, are familiar with both scenes but I am not. Her claim to fame is not simply from the adult movie business but from other things like appearing fully clothed on the Tyra Banks Show. Sasha was also recently featured in RollingStone Magazine displaying not only her intellect but her body as well. Her most mainstream claim to fame so far is being the main character in the Academy Award winning director Steven Soderbergh‘s movie, The Girlfriend Experience, which is available from Amazon and in Blu-ray. To quote Wikipedia “The New York Times described Sasha Grey’s pornographic career as “distinguished both by the extremity of what she is willing to do and an unusual degree of intellectual seriousness about doing it.” She embodies the best of all imaginable worlds.

sasha_grey_1The story of Sasha Grey is typical. She comes from a broken home and moved out to live on her own at age 16. Sasha eventually graduated from high school and studied film, dance and acting in junior college. She, like so many with her talent, had to choose between a career as a stripper or as a porn actress to make ends meet and money. Luckily for all concerned, she made the right choice.

About the adult porn industry:

A Reuter’s article states there are 11,000 pornographic titles released every year on DVD and the industry is a multi-billion dollar one. CBS puts this figure at US$10 billion. Porn is also widely accepted and appreciated in the US with big names like GM, Marriott and Time Warner selling erotica to Americans. Porn is not just an American thing with countries all over the world either having a porn industry or appreciating the porn industry. The capital of European porn is no longer Paris but Budapest, Hungary since, according to Forbes Magazine, “Hungarian girls are beautiful, they want money, and there is something in their blood. They can do it.” Do you know where that girl on your desktop is from?

I am not sure if there is a porn industry in Trinidad and Tobago but if there is it must be illegal since we are not yet a developed nation. The Internet is creating nightmares for local customs officers and religious leaders as porn is now delivered in discrete  ways customs and preachers have probably tried and tested with great success. Once people want it, you can’t stop it.

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The Art of Butts – Butt Looking Made Simple


Trinidad Carnival Made Simple

Trinidad Carnival Made Simple

The following is not considered neither sexist nor unentertaining by the author. What?

A woman’s butt can distract a man enough to make him forget what he is doing and who he is with. Both situations can be extremely dangerous. When a man is injured by the love of his life while looking at, or moments after he looked at another woman’s butt, the injury is considered both predictable and life-threatening. Doctors often remark “Butt-looking, I see” when injured men with  the word  PRADA imprinted on their foreheads are carted into the emergency rooms thought the world.  Unfortunately, this injury is likely to reoccur given that, when it comes to butt-gazing, men never learn.

Interrogation Made Simple

Interrogation Made Simple

The CIA, a progressive interrogation agency, is now experimenting with making suspects talk by briefly showing the suspects a cute, real butt clad in a tight bikini, a sight almost never seen in the suspects’ country. The suspects are then denied a second look until they talk. This technique is likely to generate numerous suspects. The new interrogation program is secretly known as “Show me the butt” and model recruitment is taking unusually long.

fish-500

Product Placement Made Simple

Product placement experts are now using the potential of the butt to sell almost anything to men. Butt level is the new eye level and products, previously unpopular to men, like chocolates, mushrooms, and insecticide are now placed at butt level to generate sales.  This product placement technique is being lambasted by moralist since they claim it encourages slackness in supermarkets. Sales of Bop and Fish insecticides have recently skyrocketed and are now the insecticides preferred by real men.

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Condom Vending Machines May Get Screwed


big-condomThis blog supports condom vending machines and good safe sex. It also supports celibacy for people who do not know how to have fun in a hammock safely without clothes on. Religious leaders claim celibacy never killed anyone but celibacy is unnatural and likely to make people incredibly horny and to get married for all the wrong reasons. Religious leaders, such as those in the IRO (Interreligious Organization) in Trinidad and Tobago, says all faith-based organizations in the country are opposed to condom vending machines since these vending machines would encourage people to have illicit sex and illicit sex is a sin. Illicit means illegal and illicit gambling is illegal but Lotto-Plus gambling is not illicit.

Condom Vending Machine

Condom Vending Machine

Fortunately, my organization is not represented by the IRO but my organization is also faith based; we have faith in the condom and at least 20 minutes of foreplay followed by steamy sex. My organization believes you can get terribly screwed without a condom and that people should always go for brand name condoms which were stored in a cool, dry place before use in that other place that is hopefully not cool or dry.  This blog is also concerned that condoms made in the most populous nations in the world may have quality control problems at their condom factories. But quality control may not be the issue but the availability of condoms might. It is deeply troubling to go to a pharmacy and ask the young girl at the counter if she recommends the Trojan or the Durex. It would be less clumsy to go to a condom vending machine which greets customers with “I am the Blues Machine. May I help you?”

How to wear a condom

How to wear a condom

Nobody is expecting the IRO to change its views or to even start to think since according to the IRO members, everything that there is to think about was thought about hundreds of years ago, including condom vending machines and porn websites.  Not only that but these thoughts were documented in  Books that can never be wrong or incomplete.

“I distrust those people who know so well what God wants them to do because I notice it always coincides with their own desires.” – Susan B. Anthony

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Some Women Would Rather go Naked


Dainty Kane

Dainty Kane would rather go naked

Some women would rather go naked than wear fur, eat KFC, or any formerly live creature because these human activities encourage cruelty to animals. Then there are the other women who would rather go naked for no real reason but yet there are those who never get naked under any conditions. I would suggest to all women if they have to go naked find a reason, it looks better on your résumé. The problem with the women who would rather go naked than encourage animal cruelty is that when they go naked people could miss the point. Yes, there would be quite a stir and people would be clicking photos like crazy at first but  after five minutes of nudity there is not much to see at the same angle and the point lost to boredom.  A clothed woman is more exciting than a constantly naked one but only if clothed scandalously in a short skirt. So nudity can make a strong point but like industrial pollution, it must not be done for long periods.

Khloe Kardashian would rather go naked

Khloe Kardashian would rather go naked

I am both an animal lover and a staunch supporter of well shaped, female nudity so I can identify both with the cause and the need. These PETA ads are not always met with enthusiasm and some even describe these PETA ads as soft porn – it could even be as hard as porn would get in some of the more religious countries. As I argued before,  nudity is an extreme tool used by PETA to create awareness of an extreme problem. We are a hard headed, selfish animal. Nudity is such a powerful tool it could even be used in political ads to win votes  saying “I would go naked if you vote for ___.

Stop The Bull

Stop The Bull

I heard somewhere that if all the insects in the world were to die there will be no life on the planet in 50 years. On the other hand, if human life were to cease, life on the planet will flourish in 50 years. I assume that would be due to the lack of the need for aluminum and fur. I think humans are self-centered which helped us survive and build so many polluting factories. Our self-made importance is good for survival of the human species but it has made mad and delusional men out of quite a few, the meat eaters and politicians, mainly. We, humans, have to approach the next few years with caution, being careful not to destroy our environment, which has been able to sustain our life and National Geographic so far. We must be careful not to assume we are the only living creatures that matter and the suffering and killing of animals for our needs somehow is not what we would want to promote as one of the best parts of being human. Man should be intelligent enough to know where the buck stops and how much clothes or cabbage a woman should wear to make a point.

Playmate Jayde Nicole Goes Veggie Dog

Playmate Jayde Nicole Goes Veggie Dog

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