The iPad is not a Tampon


Apple is trying to change the world again with the announcement of the iPad, a tablet, touch-screen PC that looks like an iPhone for old people. When iFirst heard Apple was going to launch a tablet PC, iThought of the name iTablet but iSuppose that was too druggy for Apple. But when iHeard Apple called the device iPad, iImmediately thought of tampons and iAm a man. iThink Apple has unwittingly provided  fodder for stand up comedians and may have to change the name to something like iTouch-Big, iMoses or iAintKnow.

On the iPad, people will be able to do almost everything a touch-screen laptop can do, including porn, without being able to fold it in. The iPhone, iPod and the iTouch were game changers but the iPad might be the long anticipated flop Apple’s critics and competitors were waiting for. From what iRead, the iPad offers no advantage over a laptop other than it looks not-too-trendy. Apple people are noted for using Apple devices to make an ego statement and are the type who is fond of being envied. Nobody is going to spend money on a device, regardless of how functional it is, if they are going to be called Moses by strangers while waiting at the airport.

WASA Trinidad and Tobago – More Incompetence than Water


Yesterday the Prime Minister told a small gathering the reason people are currently burning tires for water has to do with the dry Rainy Season last year plus the dry Dry Season this year. The Prime Minister forgot to mention the role his Government and WASA have played over the last few decades in causing this current shortage.  Anybody who had to deal with any state enterprise at many levels over the years would be sure to conclude that WASA stands out as a model of incompetence and stupidity. T&TEC and even TSTT have upped their service to customers tremendously over the years but WASA has regressed to something frightening even by Trinidad and Tobago standards.

Incompetence and mismanagement are a cultural and blossoming thing at WASA, and it starts with the clueless security guards at the entrance of their compounds to the highest levels of management. The people who are currently protesting for water down South would be glad to hear that WASA has leaks in the North and East of Trinidad where hundreds of thousands of gallons of water are wasted weekly. These same leaks are causing road damage and private property damage but yet go unattended despite being repeatedly reported to clueless leak specialist at WASA nearly every day. I suppose if these reports were made at certain rum shops they might be attended to.

The Board of WASA recently claimed that WASA was now a transformed organization sporting a foreign CEO, and I have to agree with the Board since WASA is now an organization that is so hopeless it makes the old WASA look like a gem. I think there isn’t much hope for WASA as they never even try to put their best foot forward since they have none. In the past, WASA was used as a political playground by the Government and the results of giving people jobs without work is taking a toll on the population and the Government. Maybe the solution to WASA’s woes is to shut the organization down and then rehire from scratch like is being planned with the Licensing Office, BIR and Customs.

There is no short-term solution to the current water riots and I predict bigger riots and protest as the dry season gets drier every day. I see almost no hope for WASA, or the country’s water supply, even in the distant future.

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Zoe Saldana is Hot in Avatar


I found Zoe Saldana so hot in Avatar I missed how complex the plot was. Most people who saw Avatar left the cinema with a deep sense of awe and revenge. I went away that as well but mainly with wondering why more women are not shaped like Neytiri .

Avatar is a special effects movie which builds to a climax where, like nearly every action movie, the cigar-smoking, macho bad guy is killed in a way to make the audience feel so good they would recommend the movie to friends. Avatar is different though, because it is a pro-forest, pro-native, anti-exploitation, anti-corporation movie with special effects that cost more than the Haiti earthquake relief effort. But Avatar was made, not to rake in over a billion dollars at the box office or to win awards, but to teach the world why we must not cut down trees or become greedy corporation bastards seeking wealth and fame.

Moral issues aside, the star of Avatar was Zoe Saldana aka Neytiri, the sexiest girl on Pandora but who is more concerned with saving the forest and falling for and then having sex with an Avatar than going to nightclubs or Planet Earth. Zoe Saldana has proven over the years she is an extremely good actress but I am wondering if nominations should go to Zoe or to her computer-transformed character, Neytiri.  I hope Zoe in Avatar is not treated like an animated character by the awards people because the acting was mostly real and only the feminine proportions were enhanced a bit – but isn’t plastic surgery also a type of special effect.

Why Flow Trinidad Internet Sucks


Flow Trinidad Internet Speed Test - 8:00 pm

Flow Trinidad Internet Ping Test 8:00 pm

This is what Flow Trinidad and Tobago, at St. Augustine looks like at 8:00 pm every night with a 10 Mb/s account – a 56kbs dial up. As predicted, Flow cannot  deliver what they promised customers because they either lack the infrastructure or technical competence to deliver what they sell. The test is one thing but people can’t even stream low resolution YouTube without 6 pauses for buffering during a 3 minute video. Half the time the video even stops loading completely.

There was no spyware on the machine as this test was done on a new Dell Studio XPS 8000 protected with the latest version of McAfee. The test was done with a direct connection from the modem to the PC via an Ethernet connection. There were no other applications running which would suck up bandwidth.  I am not the only one to have this complaint in St. Augustine and  Flow knows it. I refuse to do a speed test using the Flow Speedtest servers  located in Trinidad because, in my opinion, those servers were set up to scam customers. Sorry Flow, but your customers think you are  Dishonest, you Suck, and you Failed.

To be fair, Flow works well at around 5:00 am but at night, when it is really useful to most people, Flow is as good as WASA in the dry season.

On a brighter note, the Best Cable TV in Trinidad can be had, not from the fuzzy picture quality Flow, but from:

Lady GaGa Wants to Take a Ride on Your Disco Stick


Let’s have some fun,
This beat is sick
I wanna take a ride on your disco stick

Let’s have some fun,
This beat is sick
I wanna take a ride on your disco stick

I wanna kiss you
But if I do then I might miss you babe
It’s complicated and stupid

Got my ass squeezed by sexy cupid
Guess he wants to play,
Wants to play
A love game

A love game

Love Game – Lady Gaga

Stefani Joanne Angelina Germanotta is Lady Gaga who is currently 23 years old, talented, rich, sexy, popular and bisexual. Being 23, talented, rich, sexy and popular are some of the most important ingredients for a good life but also being bisexual adds a strange spice to the sweetbread.

Lady GaGa is no Susan Boyle and that is why I like her. GaGa has a bad girl image and can probably get any man or woman she desires in bed or hammock. This is what most people would like to think but the lifestyle and sex life of the looking- too-sexy might turn out to be just as bland as the sex life of the man in the street since living up to sexiness can be harder than looking so.

Lady GaGa is fun, I hope, and the latest thing to hit the pop phenomenon charts in recent times. She doesn’t appear to be a brief encounter on the pop scene and looks like she has more staying power than most would like to give her credit for. Lady Gaga seems to understand that having nice legs and perky breast is not a big deal and an artist has to be more – like almost naked in public – if an artist wants to make it in the competitive world of pop music. If she becomes a vegetarian and takes up yoga early, Lady GaGa will last longer than Madonna’s marriages and most bikini wax jobs.

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Helping Haiti


ft.com

I am following the lead set by Wordtryst on the Haiti earthquake crisis.

Digicel is donating five million US dollars to Haiti and the Government of Trinidad and Tobago is forking out one million US. Guyana is also donating one million US. I understand that Digicel is the largest single foreign investor in Haiti so their ties run deeper than the any country in the Caricom or even all the countries in the Caricom combined. Many countries are pledging aid to Haiti especially the US who are always ready assist in times of disaster because of their wealth and nature. I am not sure if any terrorists have pledged aid, explosives or even an imaginary cause to help the Haitians at this time.

Digicel, through full-page newspaper ads this morning, has informed the public of a number they have setup, or soon to setup, so residents of Trinidad and Tobago can use to send TT$ 3.00 per text to help Haiti – text 5151 with the word HELP. I think Bmobile, a company some strangely like to perceive as being a true local company, is still putting out full page Beyonce and Green Carnival ads while Digicel is on the right ball.

Donations can also be made using Amazon Payments to MercyCorp and also by using this Google Haiti Earthquake Page

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Doctors in Trinidad and Tobago


In Trinidad and Tobago, many years ago, people used to think that doctors were special people and high up on the social ladder but now that doctors are at least a dollar TT for six, people have a more realistic view of medics. Every family now has one doctor and some families have eight with two more in medical school every five years. Doctors are an important part of society just as garbage collectors but I get more annoyed if the garbage people are late than if the doctor doesn’t show up at his office when I have the virus, especially when the doctor finally walks in he greets his waiting patients with a snub and no smile. The first career blunder a doctor makes is assuming the superior position.

Usually Trinidad and Tobago doctors have a way of talking down to most patients and shouting at the ones who are smarter than the doctors – the Googlers. Local doctors hate to be questioned and made to look like fools in their own office. What people have been discovering about many doctors, especially the young ones, is that they hide their incompetence and lack of enthusiasm for the profession with arrogance, a stethoscope and a peculiar “educated” accent.

Drug salesmen are frequent visitors to doctors’ offices and sometimes I wonder if the drugs being prescribed or recommended by doctors are not the ones that bring in the highest commercial value to the doctors. I am not suggesting there is collusion between doctors and drug companies but this is Trinidad and Tobago where we expect most professionals to act in self-interests before anybody else’s. I have a feeling that many drug companies and doctors were against CDAP because the program threatened their lavish, and possibly undeserved lifestyle.

I remember a cardiologist telling the father of a high school friend that he, the doctor, was able to afford a $600,000 Benz and his current wife because of KFC and Golden Ray cooking butter. Trinis believe the health services must cater for their mass stupidity so Trinbagoians can forever eat what they like and think an exercise program must be only be started when the doctor tells them to start looking for a good undertaker. Instead of complaining about the Cuban, Indian and Nigerian doctors not understanding English or how to wine, people should spend time reducing the need for doctors, and by extension, some of the people who keep them in check, lawyers.

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