Life of Pi Coming Soon to a Big then small screen


After many false starts, Life of Pi, the bestseller by Yann Martel  which sold over seven million copies,was finally made into a movie. It is due to open at Movietowne on 28th November 2012. I am a big fan of the novel and will make every effort to see it on the big screen before Movietowne moves it to the tiny screens at the back of the cinema and charge the same price.

For those who don’t remember or never read the book, “Pi” is short for the main character in the novel, Piscine Molitor Patel. The other main character  is Richard Parker, a Bengal tiger.

The movie is directed by Ang Lee and not M. Night Shyamalan. Life of Pi also stars many.

From the publisher:

The son of a zookeeper, Pi Patel has an encyclopedic knowledge of animal behavior and a fervent love of stories. When Pi is sixteen, his family emigrates from India to North America aboard a Japanese cargo ship, along with their zoo animals bound for new homes.

The ship sinks. Pi finds himself alone in a lifeboat, his only companions a hyena, an orangutan, a wounded zebra, and Richard Parker, a 450-pound Bengal tiger. Soon the tiger has dispatched all but Pi, whose fear, knowledge, and cunning allow him to coexist with Richard Parker for 227 days while lost at sea. When they finally reach the coast of Mexico, Richard Parker flees to the jungle, never to be seen again. The Japanese authorities who interrogate Pi refuse to believe his story and press him to tell them “the truth.” After hours of coercion, Pi tells a second story, a story much less fantastical, much more conventional–but is it more true? 

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Clouds on the Move – Animated GIF


Clouds on the move – St. Augustine 2012

Only last week I tried the “Interval Shooting” feature on the Pentax K-7. I mounted the camera on a tripod, left the focus on manual, and set the interval time for 1 minute. I set the amount of images to 11 and used  Adobe Image Ready 7.0 to produce the GIF using 9 of the shots captured.  Image Ready was also used to reduced the size of the final GIF.

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Super 8 on the Imax


Imax is coming to Trinidad and Tobago but more specifically, One Woodbrook Place, which is way over budget was built by The HCL Group of Companies, a member of the notorious CL Financial Group. Most Trinis who will be able to easily afford a ticket to see an Imax movie locally are those who have already experienced how good an Imax movie looks and feels in countries they have funneled scarce US dollars to buy a second or third house. They are probably the ones who are also quick to complain that there is a shortage of US dollars. The rest of us will have to start a lay away plan or win tickets on a radio show competition.

I predict notwithstanding the infamy and drain on the local econpomy of One Woodbrook Place, the Imax will do well once the economy does well and the economy will do ok once there is good gas, oil, methanol, ammonia and urea prices coupled with low or no wage increases for all public sector workers.

Naturally, the local Imax will be showing all the latest block buster special effects movies and one I hope to be seeing locally or even overseas is Super 8. It was written and directed by JJ Abrams and produced by Stephen Spielberg. That combination plus a fantastic trailer will ensure Super 8 sells out our local Imax despite high ticket and popcorn prices.

Synopsis

In the summer of 1979, a group of friends in a small Ohio town witness a catastrophic train crash while making a super 8 movie and soon suspect that it was not an accident. Shortly after, unusual disappearances and inexplicable events begin to take place in town, and the local Deputy tries to uncover the truth – something more terrifying than any of them could have imagined. Written by Official site  

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Black Swan is not about sex


A kiss in Black Swan - click for a larger picture

The movie, Black Swan starring Natalie Portman gave me a better admiration for ballerinas because the movie shows how competitive and obsessive a sport ballet is.  Black Swan is rated 16+ in Trinidad and Tobago which gives the impression The Board of Film Censors showed it to some 15-year old children and realized they were almost ready for the lesbian sex scene. Progressive.

Black Swan is not for everyone, and some may find it a disturbing movie because of the blood and sensuous lesbian sex. The lesbian scenes may be the selling point of this movie for straight men as men normally take to ballet like a man takes to housework. These scenes were convincing or at least they convinced me that this might be how it is for competing ballerinas after a night of partying and a little drugs. I think The King’s Speech will take Best Picture for all the typical reasons but there is something haunting about Black Swan which says it deserves more than a simple Best Picture Oscar.

Sur les points - on the tips of the toes

Natalie Portman turns up the sensuality

Mila Kunis is a girl with a big tattoo

Sexy Mila Kunis

Amazing Natalie Portman

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Scariest Movies Ever


 

Most people are not afraid to get scared and some even will pay money to do so. With all the recent talk about the new movie, Paranormal Activity 2 and how people are jumping several times and several inches during the movie, I decided to make a list of some of the movies, I found scary.  Scary doesn’t always mean jumping at every bang or appearance of an ugly face, but it means being afraid to sleep with lights off at night for weeks or months after viewing.

Some of the best movies ever made are scary movies, but you will never find most of them being nominated for, much less winning any mainstream awards. Maybe the movie world still think boring an audience into a coma is art. I know people who went to see scary movies due to office peer pressure and faked bravery by sitting with their eyes closed or looking at the vibrating head of the person in front of them for the entire movie. Those people are known as wimps and should be exposed for what they are. I like scary movies because it takes my mind away from the scary parts of daily life. Things like slow moving traffic in the Beetham, the price of tomatoes, or seeing a rapidly aging Colm Imbert on TV.

I made a poll to select the scariest movies ever made, the results of which will be used for nothing in particular except fun.

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Shyamalan’s DEVIL


Devil is the first first in a series of movies called the Night Chronicles. M. Night Shyamalan is the brains behind this endeavor which will have both its loyal friendlies and hostiles. Devil is directed by John Erick Dowdle and written by Brian Nelson. The story comes from The Mind of M. Night Shyamalan who, according to recent reports, is being laughed at during the showing of the Devil trailers on the appearance of that statement. I assume this laughing is an attempt to ridicule Shyamalan for reasons that might be trendy. Maybe people are laughing because they feel his film making abilities has  declined steadily since Sixth Sense. I don’t know about that but Shyamalan’s movies have be making millions ever since and his recent “failure,” The Last Airbender which has grossed US$290,000,000 worldwide so far (DVD sales not added). Airbender cost US$150,000,000 to make plus US$130,000,000 to market which is hefty by any standards. On the other hand, Nicholas Cage’s Sorcerer’s Apprentice cost Disney US$160,000,000 to make and and maybe more than half of that to market but has only managed US$200,000,000 worldwide.  I am not sure how accurate budget figures are for movies as the public pronouncements about movie budgets are used as a clever marketing tool to woo dollar-centered audiences. What it seems is that Shyamalan is also  able to generate large  revenues from a loyal negative following  and in the world of celebrities, a good negative makes as much money or even more than the typical, boring positives alone.

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Inception – Not For Village Idiots


Kim Kardashian did not star in Inception but has featured in many dreams

Critics say Inception is a great movie made for the intelligent man and woman. Inception is like, well, so totally intellectual you can’t even take your mind off the movie for a second to admire the Miss Universe grade form accidentally brushing up against your almost retracted legs.

I saw Inception yesterday and I can assure you this movie is not for the stupid. Smart people found Inception so good they clapped at the end while the dumb ones hurried out the cinema with bent, confused heads carrying empty popcorn bags packed on top ketchup-stained chicken combo trays, looking for the nearest garbage bin to identify with. I pretended to be smart and gave a couple vague hand claps to hide my stupidity and tucked my chicken combo tray under the seat next to me. All I could have said to the group of both intellectual and pseudo-intellectual friends was that the movie was “cork.” One friend who is into science fiction and a physics PhD asked if I understood the movie, and I said “Wah dey hah tuh understand.”

Inception wallpaper

I was quietly confused trying to figure out whose dream was whose and what was a dream and what was a dream within a dream in this movie of dreams. The fact is that Inception is fast-paced, complicated and brilliant but it makes up for these shortcomings with totally awesome special effects. Leonardo DiCaprio played the part of a man who knows his dreams and can get into the head of other dreamers to steal secret information which I imagine can be stuff like the recipe for KFC or the facts behind the Guanapo church or even if a woman is wearing any underwear. What DiCaprio is however contracted to do in the movie is not to find out about underwear but to plant an idea in someone’s head via a dream – inception. It was a dumb idea but the movie nobody bothered to question the idea out of fear of being branded an idiot. What I was also able to pick up from the movie is that what you think is reality might be a dream and reading this blog may seem like a dream but I can assure you it is as real as silicon boobs.

Totem or Top?

So, out of fear of being labeled stupid, I rate Inception highly and recommend it to all my friends but especially my dumb enemies. You know who you are even if I don’t.

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Angelina Jolie is Salt but is She Kosher


In her latest movie, Angelina Jolie is Salt – Evelyn Salt, a tight-skirted CIA official who is accused of being a Russian spy. I think the name Salt is well chosen  since common names like Evelyn Maharaj or even Evelyn Kathiravelupillai would hardly attract the traditional spy movie crowd.  The most popular movie spies over the years were characters with simple names like James Bond and Jason Bourne since the popcorn munching multitudes are usually incapable of remembering long names during complex plots. Apart from the traditional spy names being easy to remember, the names usually pointed, in subtle ways, to important aspects of the spies’ character. Jason Bourne sounds like Jason Born, an amnesiac spy who is unaware of his murdering past so he unknowingly becomes a guilt-free, born-again truth seeker. James Bond, a more experienced, gadget toting secret agent tries to bond with all attractive females from several nations in two hours without any diplomatic or emotional fallout.

I can only speculate what the name Salt will have on our subconscious. I suppose if she’s on a table we might think of her as Table Salt or when she gets old and hard, Rock Salt.  In the mandatory Mediterranean bikini spy scene she would be considered Sea Salt. During those steamy love scenes we may think of her as tasty but Salty. If she happens to be Jewish then she will become Evelyn Kosher Salt.

I predict the Salt movies will have a long and successful future because Evelyn Salt will be a great enhancement to the male dominated spy movie world. A sexy female can do little wrong on the big screen with the right skirt and cheekbones.

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Zoe Saldana is Hot in Avatar


I found Zoe Saldana so hot in Avatar I missed how complex the plot was. Most people who saw Avatar left the cinema with a deep sense of awe and revenge. I went away that as well but mainly with wondering why more women are not shaped like Neytiri .

Avatar is a special effects movie which builds to a climax where, like nearly every action movie, the cigar-smoking, macho bad guy is killed in a way to make the audience feel so good they would recommend the movie to friends. Avatar is different though, because it is a pro-forest, pro-native, anti-exploitation, anti-corporation movie with special effects that cost more than the Haiti earthquake relief effort. But Avatar was made, not to rake in over a billion dollars at the box office or to win awards, but to teach the world why we must not cut down trees or become greedy corporation bastards seeking wealth and fame.

Moral issues aside, the star of Avatar was Zoe Saldana aka Neytiri, the sexiest girl on Pandora but who is more concerned with saving the forest and falling for and then having sex with an Avatar than going to nightclubs or Planet Earth. Zoe Saldana has proven over the years she is an extremely good actress but I am wondering if nominations should go to Zoe or to her computer-transformed character, Neytiri.  I hope Zoe in Avatar is not treated like an animated character by the awards people because the acting was mostly real and only the feminine proportions were enhanced a bit – but isn’t plastic surgery also a type of special effect.

Zombieland – A Really Good Pro-Twinkie Movie


Zombieland Poster

Zombieland Poster

As the name suggests, the movie Zombieland is a profound, horror-comedy, love story gone right. Zombieland is filled with flesh-eating humor minus the nudity which is the best recipe for attracting young people to the cinema, a people who would rather be shocked into laughter than think. Zombieland reminds me of Drag Me To Hell, another excellent, comedy-horror flick that probably has a deep message hidden within the special effects. However, the message in Zombieland is upfront, and that message is this; take time conquer your fears so that you can enjoy the edible things in life like a fresh Twinkie or a bad girl. Though, Zombieland is not Jennifer’s Body, I prefer Megan Fox in a short skirt than Wichita in a tight jeans. Sexy is in the eyes of the blogger.

Jennifer's Body is Hot

Jennifer's Body is Hot

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Time Traveler’s Wife – A Male Butt Movie


The-Time-Travelers-Wife-eric-bana-2695338-1500-1000Some might say Time Traveler’s Wife is a Chick Flick since is contains more male nudity than any movie in my recent memory. The reason for the mostly backside male nudity has to do with the fact that people can travel back and forth in time but not their clothes. This quirk makes it embarrassing for the time traveler when he arrives at some random destination at some random time; usually near a clothes store. For this reason I don’t recommend women pick up time travel even as a hobby since women are fussier about clothes than men.

Time travel at random and unpredictable times makes for a mushy love story with some blood and minor sex scenes. Time Travelers Wife (formerly a book) is also a movie containing good looking actresses and actors, Rachel McAdams and Eric Bana. Beauty had to be an important part of this movie because love stories with ugly people are on their way out since there is too much ugliness in the world and on the streets as it is. It’s hard to say if the Time Traveler’s wife is a tear-jerker but at Movietowne the lights went on later than normal at the end  so I couldn’t say for sure. I heard some coughing  but that might be mostly people trying to finish their popcorn.

Yes, I would recommend you go see Time Travelers Wife if you are a guy with the need to impress a chick and she will be impressed if she goes with you. You will not only impress her it will give her a famous butt she can compare your sorry butt to. Rachel McAdams‘s butt wasn’t too bad either.

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