Sex and West Indies Cricket


It would seem that every West Indian batsman wants to be a hero and end up on the back page of Caribbean daily newspapers for their heroic batting deeds the day before. They do this because in the Caribbean, if you are perceived as a good West Indian cricketer, especially a batsman, you will get plenty woman. Some West Indian men get women with charm and a check book while others get women by appointing them as Government Ministers. But West Indian cricketers feel in order to get the best shaped women with firm bodies and looks that would kill even after these women have just woken up from a night of partying and group sex, batsmen have to score sixes and fours at the international level, regardless of the pitch and bowling. If you are a bowler, you have to take scores of wickets but batsmen are considered sexier than bowlers because a man swinging a good size piece of willow is sexier than a man throwing  a ball at stumps.

This egoistic sexual urge by the West Indies batsmen has been the downfall of West Indies cricket over the years. The average West Indian batsman makes easy things hard because they let their urge for sex override the common sense lobe of their brain and therefore they get out quickly and by their own hand. It is known as an unforced error. Some say it is the lack of discipline by West Indian cricketers and I suppose discipline can be considered the ability to dampen ones sexual urges while batting.

Some say the West Indies have the talent to beat any team but I disagree. To me talent is having skilful brains and a desire to win. So far, and for a number of years, most West Indies cricketers have displayed almost none of the attributes of talent so how can we beat any team.  Maybe we in the West Indies just don’t have cricket talent anymore but the public have failed to admit this. For West Indies cricketers with and without talent, cricket is a job not a passion. Talent and passion for the game of cricket beats ego and sexual desires any day.

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Getting Naked on Valentine’s Day


Natasja Vermeer

Natasja Vermeer Nude

This year more and more people will be getting naked for Valentine’s Day as the celebration evolves into its true nature. Those who have accepted Valentine’s Day as a meaningful occasion have over the years realized that the original Valentine was not a saint but a simple man needing sex. If love was really the reason for celebrating Valentine’s Day I am sure nearly all men would not have the motivation to buy even a single plastic rose from a street vendor for the one they claim to “love.” A wise man once said the answer was hopefully yes and the question was always sex.

Only recently actress Julia Roberts urged women to strip for Valentine’s Day. This made Julia a hero among men who eagerly passed on a modified version the news article to as many women as they could find. Julia Roberts is no fool and her experience as a woman has now evolved into vital wisdom. I think she did mention something about making dinner reservations and having a glass of wine as well but I can’t remember.

Some would argue that Valentine’s Day should be romantic and I agree as I am a pseudo-romantic. To me, and most men, romance is really foreplay and foreplay is only foreplay when it leads to hot and steamy after play. Notice the sequence is romance followed by sex; there is  no room for love. Love is a tricky thing and it can exist alone without the romance or the sex but in that form it lacks the excitement to live a long and meaningful life. So for love to last there must be kinky romantic sex at a secluded beach resort either in Antigua or Barbados. This concept of love gave rise to the saying “A man falls in love through his penis and a woman through his credit card.”

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Karina Smirnoff

Karina Smirnoff Nude for PETA

Some Famous Love Quotes

“I was nauseous and tingly all over. I was either in love or I had smallpox.” – Woody Allen

“You’d be surprised how much it cost to look this cheap.” – Dolly Parton

“If love is blind, why is lingerie so popular?” – unknown

“Love is grand; divorce is a hundred grand.” – Unknown

“If you do kiss a politician, remember this: You are not only kissing him, you are kissing every butt that he has kissed in the last eight years.” – Jay Leno

“True love comes quietly, without banners or flashing lights. If you hear bells, get your ears checked.” -Erich Segal

“When a man opens the door of his car for his wife, you can be sure of one thing: either the car is new or the wife is.” – Unknown

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Sex, Celebrities and Sex Tapes – Why Life is So Much Fun


It would be wrong for me not to write a blog post before the end of the year without the words bikini, sex, sex tape, nudity, naked, or Tiger Woods. These are the things that people are most interested in, not world peace, world hunger, climate change or Patrick Manning’s kidneys.

I am writing these thoughts as a man who, through observation and experimentation, realized that the world is driven by sex and nudity more than, say, oat meal or reforestation. The world is more driven by 16-inch alloy rims which, incidentally, are designed to be used by car drivers as an extension or substitute for sex appeal but not money or dimples, than The Queen’s Christmas Message. So blog post with nude or almost nude females have proven to be popular but so too are blog post about celebrities such as Zoe Saldana, Tiger Woods, Michael Jackson, Jessica Alba, Kate Winslet, Beyonce and Anya Ayoung-Chee. I have observed that women who know when to get naked have more power over men, and some women, than an  old, discarded politician holding on to power like it was his last erection or  Chinese bedroom curtain.

Instead of people burning tires to fix roads, or clashing with police to try to change those perpetually dull minds in Parliament, people should stay home and have sex or at least, get naked. Have a sexfest not a protest. But if you want thousands of people to march to Woodford Square to protest the New Property Tax, enlist women who would strip for the cause, thus creating the right attraction. We are too conservative in our approach to getting our point across and PETA realized this many years ago. To make a point you don’t have to be logical since logic is often dull and never as inspirational as emotion, and the emotion of sex is the most compelling emotion yet.

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Why Golf Makes Men Horny


After hearing the language of golf, it is not surprising that Tiger Woods probably felt a little horny after a day on the field. Golf  to the uninitiated may look like a dead man’s sport but it is anything but. It is a game for gentlemen and women who have moved up the social ladder so can no longer get turned on using crude and direct sexual statements in public. The upper and better people are still human and need sex as much as the lower ones and sometimes in kinkier ways because they can afford it.  Golf is really a game of sex and just by looking at the positions the female adopts during the game makes me feel it should be removed from public TV along with women’s beach volleyball and bikini mud wresteling. Let’s keep TV clean.

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Here is a joke circulating on the Internet which puts golf in its rightful place.

Why Golf is a Horny Game:

1. Look at the size of his putter.
2. Oh, dang, my shaft’s all bent.
3. You really whacked the hell out of that sucker.
4. After 18 holes I can barely walk.
5. My hands are so sweaty I can’t get a good grip.
6. Lift your head and spread your legs.
7. You have a nice stroke, but your follow through leaves a lot to be desired.
8. Just turn your back and drop it.
9. Hold up. I’ve got to wash my balls.
10. Damn, I missed the hole again.

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Driving Tiger Woods Away From Home


Before it was alleged that Tiger Woods had one or many affairs with women while he was married he was considered a stud and an amazing golfer. Sponsors flocked at his door, eager for a piece of the action and Tiger was also not adverse to action. He made millions from the likes of Nike, Gatorade and Tag Heuer. I remember seeing a Tag Heuer ad featuring Tiger Woods  and being a Tiger Woods wannabe, rushed out to get one but ended up with something in my price range;  a discounted Timex.

Women idolized Tiger Woods because he represented cool and rich, the two things women aspire in men more than common sense. But all good things eventually hit a tree and a fire hydrant in the early hours of the morning and Tiger was no exception. This tree-and-fire-hydrant-hitting incident by Tiger Woods caused people to speculate that it looked like serious woman trouble. Unable to breaks any longer, Tiger finally admitted he transgressed but did not give the details the press and other detractors were looking for. Now there are rumors that Tiger performed some of his transgressions for two and half years with a cocktail waitress which is not an uncommon dream amongst normal men. These rumors only created more admirers in the form of married and unmarried men as they too wanted to be like Tiger without getting the wood.  The rumors also alleged that Mr. Woods had many other affairs which had girlfriends and wives taking a more self righteous look at the situation and they all wished Tiger dead.

This situation is unfortunate as nobody stopped to ask Tiger if he found women as exciting as hitting a hole-in-one. Nobody stopped to ask Tiger if he was a normal, unhappy man who found transgression a path to happiness and a necessary part of being found irresistibly sexy by sexy women. Nobody stopped to ask the priest if he liked children or the occasional nun either. I don’t know if Tiger Woods will lose sponsorship from the other self righteous set of people in the world, corporations, but I will not buy any products made by companies that drop Tiger Woods because there is always a deeper reason for transgressing than being a rich, famous, sexy man nicknamed Woods.

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Porn in Trinidad and Tobago – Something New


Korean cat?

Until recently, Trinidad and Tobago was not a force in the porn production industry but with recent “accidental” successes, our GDP looks set to grow, or at least bulge, in the coming months.

I have been reading for sometime that Trinidad and Tobago is the #1 country for porn searches per capita and knowing Trinis, I am sure that is “free porn.” I don’t have any stats but how many people in this country would pay for online porn? On the other hand, South Korea is a country that is not as God fearing or cheap as Trinidad and Tobago with each South Korean (adult, I assume) spending $US526.76 each year on porn which means South Korea spends over $US25 billion annually to have a damn good time. It appears that South Korea is a country that puts its money where its mouth would like to be. Maybe Trinidad and Tobago secretly spends on porn and that is why there is a shortage of foreign exchange to buy CDAP drugs, hospital beds and private jets.

Is porn really that popular in Trinidad and Tobago and if so, why? I have no doubt that porn is popular all over Trinidad and Tobago but that popularity is part of being a young nation and the young is preoccupied with sex. Another reason porn might be popular in Trinidad and Tobago is due to our smallness (geographic) and now have a few dollars, we can afford more Internet connections, thus opening more eyes to a world of exciting possibilities on weekends. Maybe Health Minister Narace will tackle porn after he conquers sweetness and health. I suppose porn is used only to point in the right direction, but porn should never be the final destination or reason for cramps.

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Zombieland – A Really Good Pro-Twinkie Movie


Zombieland Poster

Zombieland Poster

As the name suggests, the movie Zombieland is a profound, horror-comedy, love story gone right. Zombieland is filled with flesh-eating humor minus the nudity which is the best recipe for attracting young people to the cinema, a people who would rather be shocked into laughter than think. Zombieland reminds me of Drag Me To Hell, another excellent, comedy-horror flick that probably has a deep message hidden within the special effects. However, the message in Zombieland is upfront, and that message is this; take time conquer your fears so that you can enjoy the edible things in life like a fresh Twinkie or a bad girl. Though, Zombieland is not Jennifer’s Body, I prefer Megan Fox in a short skirt than Wichita in a tight jeans. Sexy is in the eyes of the blogger.

Jennifer's Body is Hot

Jennifer's Body is Hot

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