“No one wants to die. Even people who want to go to heaven don’t want to die to get there. And yet death is the destination we all share. No one has ever escaped it. And that is as it should be, because death is very likely the single best invention of life. It is life’s change agent. It clears out the old to make way for the new.”
–Steve Jobs -Stanford University commencement speech, 2005
Ever notice when somebody dies tragically the photo that makes the newspapers is from the victim’s driver’s permit, ID card, or passport; all photographic nightmares. To me, it’s tragic enough someone died terribly but why does the press see the need to humiliate the victim and the victim’s loved ones further with such a photograph. It’s like throwing salt in Diet Coke.
Since the reporters and editors are part human, part stone, part insensitive I want to suggest everybody carry in their wallets a good photo displaying their most flattering photographic side and label the photo “Just in case.” If you are not an attractive person, have the photo altered with Photoshop. If Photoshop fails, see a plastic surgeon, or cheaper yet, carry a photo of a better looking person instead but not so good looking as to arouse suspicion. The aim is to make the public feel sorry you passed, not glad you left the world to make it a prettier place.
Actor, Rowan Atkinson, aka Mr Bean, is an electrical engineer with an MSc degree from Queens College, Oxford so, like aka, he is obviously no dunce. With and estimated worth of £100 million, he is also no pauper and much smarter than the average electrical engineer. One of my favorite Mr. Bean episodes is Mr. Bean Goes to the Dentist, which I fondly remembered yesterday while waiting for my dentist to say “Open! Drill! Restraints!” followed by “Wow, what an Audi, probably an A6 this time.” Like much copyrighted stuff, I found Mr. Bean Goes to the Dentist posted on YouTube, which probably is in contravention of copyright laws and ethical behavior.
Aka_lol’s Random Thoughts on Dentists
- Dentists are not dogs and therefore are not man’s best friends.
- According to the Straight Dope website, dentists are 6.64 times more likely to commit suicide than the average population. This is why I check on my dentists more often than I would check on my barber or even my plumber. I need him alive. I want him to suffer for as long as possible.
- I think causing physical pain and financial anguish to patients must be stressful for dentists and can cause them to go for a piece of rope or a strap on a suicide bomb as often as they go for BMWs and sexy Audis.
- It never huts dentists as much as it hurts their patients.
Michael Jackson - 1958 to 2009
So, what happens to us after we die? Well, if we were any good we would have ten albums in the Top Ten at the same time. We would be on the cover of nearly every newspaper in the world and we would be the subject of countless blogs. The news of our death would cause the big TV networks and small ones to dump their regular programming to carry the event. People would gather in large numbers at our home and the hospital where we died. We would have the most popular, currently watched videos on YouTube and our music played all day on the radio. Our death would cause shock, sadness but a flood of happy memories. We would be idolized and our questionable side put into perspective. We would cause the World to stop dead in its tracks and celebrate our life rather than mourn. If we were any good, people would be singing our songs to fill an emptiness they can’t hide.
I suppose it is only after he died Michael Jackson knew what his life really meant.