Who do I Look Like?


aka_lol imagines dodging bullets matrix-style

aka_lol imagines dodging bullets matrix-style

A man in the line to buy doubles was talking to all audiences and said about a year ago his partner get bumped off. It was a case of mistaken identity since his partner looked like a witness. This had me thinking; who do I look like. Sometimes I feel I look like a witness, not Jehovah, but a real witness. I might even look like ah doe fraid nobody and ah would run mih mouth. Sometimes I feel I look like a hero and even have illusions of dodging bullets Matrix style while sitting in traffic. Who I look like is not even the most worrying thing but who does the man standing next to me look like. Does he look like a witness? Is he a witness? This is Trinidad and Tobago where dying has less to do with KFC and doubles and more to do with being in the wrong place next to the right man.

Getting accidentally bumped off while buying doubles or entering a shop would not be the problem it is today if hit men were properly trained in target recognition. I think this is clearly a case of the criminal element, eager to get away, stooping low and giving crime a bad name. Local criminals have been hiring, cheaply, any and everybody who call themselves hit men just because they know a policeman with a gun to rent. A proper hit man practices shooting watermelons and other in-season fruits with special sniper rifles with uncanny precision for weeks before target-day and don’t just open fire in a bar, shooting everyone in sight while the real target sneaks out the back without paying. This is inefficient and not good for beer sales. I am not a hit man but I have seen The Day of The Jackal often enough to know our hit men are a big joke and light years away from being all that they could be. Come on people, crank it up a notch before we die laughing.

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