Today, February 12, 2009 marks the 200th birthday of Charles Darwin, a man who discovered we didn’t just happen but evolved from some sort of blob or blog. Unfortunately or fortunately, Charles Darwin did not have a blog in the form that exist today otherwise he would have received numerous hate-comments from those who would have preferred he renounced his Theory of Evolution on his death bed. He would have also received much praise and a blog award or two. If Darwin was alive today he would not have become a celebrity woman-beater or taken a vacation on The Galapagos Islands but would have, instead, written a blog post called the Origin of The Modern Blog.
Fortunately, this blogger is not like Charles Darwin and is still alive. This blogger is also Darwin’s very distant relative since we both evolved from the same mess. Having a couple of the same genes as Darwin, this blogger will now try to briefly explain the highly ignored and disrespected Theory of Blog Evolution:
When the first blog started several years ago it was boring. It consisted of the blogger lamenting the taste of oatmeal and his wife’s mother. Maybe he was a serial killer or pervert, I don’t know. However, since that time, many blogs spawned from that one blog. Blogs branched out into several categories such as humor, politics, entertainment, hobbies, science, voodoo, diaspora, activism, oath meal, nothing-really, and even boredom. Thankfully, not all blogs survived and the process called the natural selection of blogs weeded out unfit blogs but that did not mean the blog had to be perfect to survive. Good enough was all blogs needed to be and there are now too many of those. Yes, some blogs did change by chance and WordPress but they mainly changed to adapt to their environment. That environment could have been in the form of lack of visitors or even a lack of comments. It could also have been in the form of the war in Iraq, girl-hitting by a popular R&B singer, or even corruption in Port of Spain.
Michael Phelps developed a streamline body because he spent most of his life in water. Usain Bolt developed long legs to escape speeding gangsta bullets and fans in Jamaica. In the same way some blogs developed comment moderation to handle hostile comments and sexy spam while others that failed to adapt were crushed under the weight of sex and real estate for sale comments. Some blogs attached themselves to widgets to have some useful content or slick attractions for visitors while others shamelessly advertised on Google in order to survive. Unfortunately, blogs by themselves did not have the intelligence to know what change was right or wrong and sometimes neither did the blogger. If the blog suited the environment the blog survived and some even developed into well-visited blogs with some useful content and produced a few good looking children.
This Theory of Blog Evolution is based on observation of the facts. It is not a pie in the sky or wishful thinking. As more fossilized blogs are found and studied the theory will be modified accordingly and if necessary.