Operation Hand Bill

Citizens breathed a sigh of relief as it became apparent that the countless millions spent on intensive crime-fighting training for the much respected police service, and the countless millions more on hi-tech balloons did not go to waste as the latest crime plan was unleashed by the Government onto the population. High ranking security officials, including the CoP, are said to be overjoyed over this latest, and last crime fighting initiative which they once again feel will hopefully be the blimp to break that back called crime.

Officially, the anti-crime drive is called Operation Handbill but unofficially it’s called Get Him Now. It is also reported that the Police Service, like CEPEP, will leave no stone unturned in the quest to make the country safe by eradicating those who commit the unpardonable crime of handing out handbills without the printer’s name and address. The announcement of this latest crime plan has now caused countless thousands of once perceived law abiding citizens to go into hiding but not under stones, or cable TV stations for fear of being uncovered by CEPEP, or the Government’s Telecom Authority. Experts have indicated there is now little difference between the two organizations and they are expected to be merged later in the year.

Full page ads are to be placed in the all the daily and weekly newspapers informing citizens to immediately report the sighting of any handbills without the printers name and address by calling 800-HAND or 800-BILL. Millions have also been pumped into a special handbill witness protection program to ensure its success. Operation Handbill will continue until citizens learn that final lesson of the lengths and depths the Government is willing to go to retain the status quo.