Trinidad and Tobago vs NSW – CLT20 Finals Poll


Trinidad and Tobago beat Cape Cobras today and secured a place in the CLT20 finals tomorrow. Vote now.

Trinidad and Tobago became the favorite among the cricketing world and they moved from underdog at the start of the competition, to top dog today. The winner of the finals will take home $US2.4 million. The losers would hardly be considered losers and take home $US1.4 million. Not a bad dollar-haul considering Sir Allen Stanford is broke and beaten up in a US jail. The money is good but not as important as the example the Trinidad and Tobago team has set for West Indies Cricket.

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Trinidad and Tobago – The Hidden Truth


Mayaro beach - Tambran BallThe talented people of Trinidad and Tobago will not be attracted to a Prime Minister who is against plundering the public’s purse and such a Prime Minister of integrity will be surrounded by non-performers who will spend the rest of their lives boasting they didn’t thief but yet won’t  be able to show even one community center or public outhouse for all their years of integrity.

Our current Prime Minister and the one before him understood only too well that the public may say they don’t want wasteful, billion-dollar public projects but yet flock in droves around the Waterfront or Centre of Performing Arts with cameras to send pictures back to their family in the States just to impress them. The public would even boast to their foreign family that they don’t have to walk out the plane with umbrellas, raincoats or aluminum foil anymore. We are a society that publicly cries corruption but privately upload mega-project photos on Flickr with misguided pride.

Our recent leaders have recognized true talent and did what had to be done to attract these super talented people. The public understands this. We are more entertained by Commissions of Enquiries than troubled by them.  Without UDECOTT, property tax, murders,  drunk driving, Bailey bridges and The Chinese, I shudder to think what the headlines in the newspapers would be – maybe “Vendor arrested for pedaling oval Tambran Balls – Mayor claims an oval is not a ball. School Principal says he is a fool and threatens a beating” So, as much as we are disgusted by criminals taking over the country, both with guns and foreign bank accounts, we quietly realize it is the only way our small country can get to 2020 status without a private jet.

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Miss Trinidad and Tobago Universe 2010 – The Heat is on


Beauties Aspiring to be Miss Universe Trinidad and Tobago 2010

Beauties Aspiring to be Miss Universe Trinidad and Tobago 2010

The picture above makes me glad I am not a woman because only as a man I can appreciate what a bikini beauty means to mankind.  I am also glad I am not a woman because if I were, I would have entered the competition and blown away the hopes of the other aspirants, not only with my perfect Barbie-like proportions, but with my sensual charms and well placed dimples.  I would have made mincemeat of those gray-headed judges and have them eating whipped cream from the palm of my hand. If I were a woman I would have those old geezers begging not only for more, but to not call their wives or girlfriends. Holding up my number and being inspected would have turned me on and unleashed my charms. My UWI education would have counted for something but only on my Miss Universe resume and not in my head. My beauty would have been the stuff men crave 24/7 and cost them their place in Heaven.

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Forgive the rant above and though being a beauty competition judge is still my boyhood dream, I don’t envy the amount of bad-eye I would receive from the rejected contestants. Who am I to decide who is better than who, they would say. My score sheet and remarks would be etched in my brain and labeled “Top Secret” for security purposes. Maybe online voting should be part of the selection process to help point the aging judges in the right direction. Seeing too many bikini-clad beauties over a short space of time can only cause old men to bend and break. But I speak as an envious man with no training in either beauty selection or  knowing a good thing when I see it.

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The Stupid of Trinidad and Tobago and the Septic Tank of no Return


stop-akalol.wordpressA new and radical method of democracy is being proposed for Trinidad and Tobago. The new method recommends the replacement of the one-man-one-vote system with one-man-many-votes, depending on one’s IQ. The higher one’s IQ, the more voting power one will be assigned. This new method proposes to not only allow the country to move in the smartest direction possible, but to reverse the destruction established by the stupid. Over the years, the stupid were allowed to dominate the political scene because the smart were too busy reading good books, Miami-shopping and engaging in clever letter writing to newspapers rather than doing anything constructive. While the smart were asleep, the stupid were doing what they do best, stupidness.

Critics of the proposed system say the new voting system will give the smart an upper hand in the running the country and relegates the stupid to their rightful place in the dung heap. In response to the critics, proponents of the new IQ-based-voting system ask “And that is a problem?” The critics fear some citizens and most politicians would be unable to vote because of their IQ and will feel left out of the decision making process. It is both feared and hoped that most may end up shoveling real manure for minimum wage for the rest of their lives. The proponents again ask “And this is a problem?”

The suggestion of the system came about because of the huge negative impact the stupid of Trinidad and Tobago was having on the economy and not for hell they could any of the stupid understand the economic concept called “de money done.”

Judging from the news, the stupid was running rampant for years and had no problem appearing on TV to spew whatever little they had in their heads. The stupid was able to infiltrate, not only the Government, the Presidency, the police service, and the Opposition but those hallow (or hollow) institutions of democracy.  Not bad for stupid people. The stupid were unable to understand anything and simply spent the country’s money willy-nilly on a few tall buildings and one ugly airport. The stupid instituted public policy based on dotisheness1 not Kevin Baldeosingh. Public policies from the stupid were often presented to the public in nicely bound folders and even pdf files to create the illusion of content. Most of the dotish wore ties while the most dotish wore suits and nice dresses to Parliament and Board meetings.

Naturally, some will always argue that IQ is not related to integrity and a smart man may pocket enough on every contract he awards to be able to make his wife happy by buying foreign apartments and yachts. In extreme cases, the smart man may award contracts to his family who comes from a country where everybody has the same name.

The creators of the IQ-based-voting system said dishonest smart men would have little effect on the outcome of an election since they are in the minority and have Green-Cards and American houses. In every democratic country, all major political parties are supported by enough die-hard, stupid people and it is these stupid ones which have the country perpetually in poop-street. Because poop is crap, stupid people need to be restrained before the country slips into that  septic tank of no return.

1Dotishness {dote-ish – ness} – noun – a damn stupid act performed by a damn stupid imbecile.

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Champions League Twenty20 – Amazing Trinidad and Tobago


CricketToday - After New South Wales blew Trinidad and Tobago’s bowling to bits, almost no one thought TnT could get the 171 needed  to win in 20 overs and for most of their innings Trinidad and Tobago looked on the brink of defeat. By now the cricketing world following the Champion League knows  that Trinidad and Tobago is not only the home of Brian Lara but also home to some amazing cricketers, and to quote the Cricinfo scoreboard on the match, “Trinidad & Tobago won by 4 wickets (with 9 balls remaining).”

Neither scoreboards nor Tony Cozier can give the full picture and it was Kieron Pollard’s 54 from 18 balls with five FOURS and five – SIXES which stole the match from the Australians. You had to see it to believe it! Pollard, with the arrogance of a winner blasted Henriques for two FOURS and three SIXES in the 17th over and then for one FOUR and two consecutive SIXES in the 19th to win the match for Trinidad and Tobago. It was almost like the TnT team lead by Daren Ganga was saying “To hell with the West Indies political cricket.”

cock1I don’t know what more to say and you can check it out at ESPNCricinfo and at SkySports. This Trinidad and Tobago Cricket team is AMAZING with three wins from all three matches, including defeating the IPL Champions, the Deccan Chargers, Trinidad and Tobago has energized Twenty20 Cricket like no other team.

For Trinidad and Tobago to get to the League wasn’t easy and thanks should go to India’s largest poultry company and no thanks to the oppressive, POLITICAL OIL COMPANY.

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Only In Trinidad and Tobago


only-in-trinidad

Only in a non-2020 country would steel sticking out the rear be considered normal and a career goal.

Is this truck/van driver breaking the law? Well, probably not depending which police station you complain to.  Everybody knows that the worst people to ask if something is against the law in Trinidad and Tobago are policemen, or policewomen, followed by school principals with a thing for strippers.

In Trinidad and Tobago we are so accustomed to what is wrong we have no idea what is right or red. Judging from the amount of shoulder-hoggers who also go to church for heaven sakes, and who would get into a rage if you try to filter correctly, I would say we are truly blessed since we have the law on the majority’s side.

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Kindle now available in Trinidad and Tobago – Yaay!!


bezos_kindleAmazon will finally be offering the Kindle for sale in Trinidad and Tobago from October 19th. It will be sold for US$279 which is about TT$1,775. I am not sure if local customs will classify the Kindle the same as a laptop or computer and charge no taxes or if it will be considered a high-end luxury device and add between 45 to 55 % tax. If  this luxury tax is added it will keep the Kindle, a reading device, out of the reach of anyone who aspires to be a book collector on a budget but especially those who are already saving for the new property taxes and migration fees.

If you don’t know what a Kindle is by now you are probably not passionate about books and have decided to close your mind to new ideas like ebooks and aluminum smelters emitting toxic dust. Kindle is a device and software platform launched by Amazon in November 2007 for reading digital media such as ebooks. The Kindle has been a great success since that time and like the Wii, people had to wait in line to get one. For details on the features of International Kindle, click here and here.

the_raw_feed_on_kindle-BIGThe main argument against the Kindle is that it is not paper and cuddly  and I also thought so until I picked up a 6-inch Kindle and enjoyed reading on it. Still, I don’t think it will replace paper in a hurry despite the fact the world has grown fond of cuddling up with battery powered devices of various sizes for years. The Kindle being offered to international markets will hold about 1,500 books and the rest can be archived by Amazon.  People with the International Kindle in Trinidad and Tobago will be able to buy Kindle books and download them wirelessly and tirelessly with just a click or two. It appears that Amazon will be using the local GSM/GPRS networks from Bmobile and/or Digicel.  Amazon said there will be no charge for using the network in Trinidad and Tobago – you only have to pay for the book.

Kindle_2_-_Front-700Typically, ebooks are cheaper than paper books, and for example,  Cafe au Lait by Liane Spicer sells for US$6.99 in paperback but for US$4.79 in Kindle format. That is about a 30% saving, not including the cost to ship the book to Trinidad via a Caribbean Express box.  The Kindle is tempting because of the lower book prices and it is tree-friendly.  What the Kindle will also do for the book world is reduce the incidents of book borrowing and recovery through threats and violence. The Kindle is a black and white, or more correctly, a few shades of gray device, which would rule out certain types of porn. Still, I am for the Kindle even if it threatens property tax as the main reason for poverty.

Details of Kindle in Trinidad and Tobago

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The Global Climate Wake-Up Call


“On 21 September 2009, at more than 2600 events in 135 countries across the globe, we joined together to issue a deafening wake-up call to world leaders on climate change. The breadth and creativity of events is breathtaking, and our message broke through to leaders and international media. ” - avaaaz.org

Trinidad and Tobago was listed as having one (1) activity and it was listed as:

The Climate Wake-Up Call Hike-A-Thon

Monday, September 21 at 12:18 PM
Place: Lopinot Main Road, Arouca, Trinidad and Tobago
Host:  Heather-Dawn Herre

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God for Trinidad and Tobago


The Pike - Long Beach - California

The Secretary of the IRO said “In times like these, and not just what is happening in Trinidad and Tobago, but all over the world, prayer is one of the ways by which we can communicate with God and let him know what we feel … We have to let him know our troubles and he will find a way,” This statement is further proof that even his followers and those in the God industry realize that our God is not as powerful as believers first imagined since he doesn’t know how you feel unless you tell him in a day of prayer set by the IRO. But he  is a Trini since he is snoring on the job.

By His repeated inaction, the God of Trinidad and Tobago has sent a clear message he doesn’t care about the murder rate, traffic jams, floods, plastic bottles, property taxes or even kickbacks. The IRO, the pinnacle of wisdom in the country outside of Cabinet, is again calling for a day of prayer to heal the nation that is sick of taxes and being severely beaten by bandits at home on Tuesdays. Because of inside information, the IRO is 100% certain that God requires a certain number of people to pray and if that number is achieved then, and only then, he will snap in to action – just like a politician.

“In the beginning, the world was without fault, but now, our country is in a period of darkness and turmoil and we need to pray,”  said another illuminated member of the IRO. This truth is so obviously obvious I wonder why we just don’t pray all day instead of bad talking the Minister of National Security, the Integrity Commission and even the President with a nasal voice and little brain.

“If absolute power corrupts absolutely, where does that leave God?”
George Deacon.

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Commission of Enquiry Fiasco – Only in Trinidad and Tobago


no weed-mayarobeach.comPeople are starting to ask if the whole Commission of Enquiry fiasco was planned from the start of corruption activities. From the actions of a party loyalist disguised as a caring lawyer to his meteoric departure, then to find the COI was illegal because the brilliant minds didn’t publish it in the Gazette. In between all this was the no-nonsense DPP being appointed a judge and the former AG terminated in favor of a more loyal one. All this is awesome and should be made into a movie soon. It could be called “When The Man Hits The Fan The ManWill Smile”

Was there so much to cover up that an intricate plan of staged bias had to be hatched? Was it necessary to spend millions of recession dollars on the Commission then abort the Enquiry? Everybody knows this Government is not good with tax payers’ money and throwing away millions to save some loyal and crooked racketeers from going to jail is not unexpected. This latest incident shows the people how smart manish this Government really is and everybody knows a smart manish Government could never be good for the many, only the very few crooked ones, and those who hate regardless of their crooked backings.

To distract the public, a next smelter should be announced. More guns should also be found hidden in a selected police station as “No Weed Sold Here” signs are placed outside all stations. The price of gasoline should be increased so the Chambers could run dey mouth while milking the country dry in between the floods. Maybe the powers that be could arrange a few more murders to distract the public from the thiefing going on in plain sight. Of course, we are fed up but with the dotish Don Quixote on the other side, afraid to make jail again and our inability to rise above the complaints, we are screwed. We will, no doubt, write several letters to the editors and some may even blog about these historic events but in a few days it will be bad business as usual and a call to clean the drains.

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Trinidad and Tobago Budget 2010 and Other Money Matters


Trinidad and Tobago - Port of Spain -1The Heritage and Stabilization Fund

The Heritage and Stabilization Fund of Trinidad and Tobago, or fondly called the National Piggybank, is like a hundred dollar bill and once you break it, it may disappear in Miami. The fund is fortunately controlled by law and a five member Board with proven competence in the fields of finance, investment, economics, business management or law, including an officer of the Central Bank and the Ministry of Finance. Non-supporters of PM PM or critics of Early CL Financial Withdrawals by those who knew will not normally be considered for membership to this five-member Board regardless of competence in the stated fields. However,  an exception will be made for those who have a yacht and high-rise apartment in Miami bought with deadly and sensual money.

The Trinidad and Tobago International Financial Centre

Tall Building Port of Spain Trinidad-1The Trinidad and Tobago International Financial Centre or The Real Central Bank will be launched soon now that the South terminal at Piarco International Airport has been upgraded to the standards demanded by the Important but Greedy People Who Want to Get Their Hands on Our Funds and also now that the top of Number One Woodbrook Place can be seen by all common people even on a cloudy, and floodless day. Big names with private jets and helicopters and who can pass the litmus integrity test set by our President of Integrity and nasal tones are practically banging The Minister of Finance‘s Door to get into the TTIFC. According to a report in the Trinidad Guardian on May 14th 2009, the clientele of the TTIFC will be persons who own private jets, whose currency is time and they have to maximise use of their time. “So private jets are not a luxury but a necessity for people like that.” If they could have a private jet who is he to not.

Budget for 2010

Trinidad Helicopter-1The Budget for 2010 will be  unleashed in Parliament tomorrow and in keeping with developed nation wannabe status there will be no excessive spending except for the excessive spending was committed to in back rooms some time ago. Both the rich man and the poor people with Audis and BMWs will be asked to pay more at the pump which will make pumping even more expensive. An Obama-type tax on the rich will be introduced but not to better the lot of the poor. This new Trini-tax will help fund the shortfall in kickbacks due to the recession and also facilitate vital social programs like reelection of the ruling party and helicopters. The Budget 2010 will see words of caution, hope and as usual, will have plenty Hart.

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Expatriates in Trinidad and Tobago


made-in-usa-600

Made in USA

I have been working now and then with expatriate (expat) engineers with many foreign accents in Trinidad and Tobago for several years and the one thing I can say about these mostly male engineers is that they experience Trini culture and women to the fullest. I am not sure how truthful these expats are but most say they are either divorced or single and I suppose that’s why they can safely work away from home with a local woman for so long.

barbecue-550

Trinidad Barbecue Chicken

Locals think of expats as those foreigners who build something in Pt. Lisas while shacking up with bar girls in an apartment in Westmoorings. The public even feel expats leave their mark in more places than the Industrial Estates in the form of children who resemble but are forgotten by them. I can’t say for sure about expats leaving their mark in that way in modern Trinidad and Tobago as Trini women are not easy to fool or forget since our girls are educated and look at plenty cable TV. I get the impression expats see local women as one reason for enduring the constant threat of bullet or stab wounds in guarded condos in Westmoorings. Only a few years ago, when there were tonnes of Irish men in Trinidad and Tobago, our country lost some good women through love and migration to these Guinness-drinking, party maniacs. The Irish presence now seems to be down to a trickle.

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Local Dasani Water

Expats are not always a bad influence as they are largely responsible for the steak and beer sections in Westmooring’s Hi-Lo and the Trojan and sex-toy section in Westmooring’s SuperPharm. Our local Expats love bottled water because they were taught in Expat School that the locals know as much as US citizens about clean running water. Because they speak with foreign accents, expats are considered by locals to be experts in their field but this typically turns out to be not so and most are just ordinary engineers cloaking their stupidity with foreign accents and local girls in short skirts.

It is a fact we need some foreign staff in Trinidad and Tobago to build aluminum, ammonia, urea, and methanol plants, but we would prefer competent expats rather than ones sent for cosmetic reasons, only sucking up local resources and women.

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An Interview with Chennette


chennette-600Check out  Chennette’s interview on Amazing Trinidad Vacations. Chennett has developed the tasty and unique blog, Lifespan of a Chennette, with recipes, comments, and photographs about mainly local and Caribbean food. Chennette also includes foreign foods she experienced on her frequent travels to far off lands such as Turkey, Barbados and Grenada. According to Chennette she is “a Trini currently living and working in Guyana, with the good fortune of being able to hop around some of the beautiful places in the Caribbean, all the while learning how to use my camera.”

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Producing Productivity in Trinidad and Tobago


productivity-chartProductivity – A country’s productivity is usually measured by the country’s GDP per hours worked.

GDP – Measuring GDP is complicated (which is why we leave it to the economists), but at its most basic, the calculation can be done in one of two ways: either by adding up what everyone earned in a year (income approach), or by adding up what everyone spent (expenditure method). Logically, both measures should arrive at roughly the same total. ~ Investopedia

Productivity isn’t everything but in the end it is almost everything. A country’s ability to improve its standard of living over time depends almost entirely on its ability to raise its output per worker. ~ Paul Krugman

Short skirts in the workplace has been shown to boost productivity by boosting attendance. ~ aka_lol

productivity cartoonPrime Minister Patrick Manning said the country’s productivity has been falling for the last five years and though I didn’t have the figures to prove it I had a gut feeling it was so since everybody I knew was either stuck in traffic or flood during productive times.  The Prime Minister is saying we citizens were being paid more and more over those five years but we produced less and less. I feel a sense of shame because of this. What The Prime Minister didn’t say was people were being paid more and more for one of several reasons -  to avoid starvation due to inflation, to go apartment shopping in Miami or to help win elections. The Prime Minister also said in his speech to launch the Productivity Council that citizens must work harder and come to work on time – the answers are always so simple.

productivitySo we need to produce more corn curls, Crix and painted stones (aka GDP) per man per hour.  How we in Trinidad and Tobago achieve more productivity will not be easy since UDECOTT is already spending efficiently and the new helicopters will produce more than just dust in we face. The Parliamentarians are taking the lead and agreed to a much deserved wage freeze but will produce more hot air in return. All these efforts must be commended but I am mostly hoping the 15-man Productivity Council has enough productive members to produce a productive report worth producing at a competitive price.

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Trinidad Plum


Trinidad Plum

Trinidad Plum

I don’t know if the common Trinidad plum is Spondias radlkoferi, Carissa macrocarpa or Spondias Purpurea but is doesn’t matter since nobody cares. The common plum in Trinidad and Tobago bears around July and August which caused that time of the year to be called plum season. These common plums come in two varieties, sour and not so sour when green, but when ripe they could get worms. The common plums can be eaten as is but in Trinidad and Tobago they are often eaten  with a bit of salt and a couple bird peppers or even pepper sauce if you live in the city. The more adventurous are likely to make plum chow which is made with plum, salt, plenty pepper, and a bit of water to coat everything. The plum is sliced so help absorb the seasoned mixture. People have been known to shed tears and use foul language when the chow’s hotness (Scoville Heat Scale) exceeds the person’s tolerance for hotness.

There is a bigger and juicer plum in Trinidad and Tobago called Governor plum but these are hardly ever seen in public or ever admit to being wrong. I think Governor plum is highly overrated and mostly a cosmetic plum drawing a big salary.

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