Jack Warner is hoping to be selected as the candidate for the now vacant Chaguanas West seat as a UNC member. This seat was made vacant by Mr. Warner himself as a reputable report was released worldwide stating Mr. Warner was less than honest in his financial football dealings over the years. The Prime Mister, unable to ignore credible evidence for a change, finally expressed shock and horror which angered or embarrassed Jack into resigning. Nobody knows. This report has probably worked in his favor as now no one can say they think Jack Warner was a dishonest man.
From the full page ads and reports reaching this blog, Mr. Warner, like the UNC executives, will go down fighting. Jack has popularity among the poor and romantic as his weapon, and the UNC, it seems, has the ability to victimize anyone who is observed to be part of Jack’s motorcade and support. Both sides are wielding big sticks against each other with the end result favoring Jack over the pretentious but powerful. Jack’s secret weapon is well known and that is to go as an independent candidate thus leaving the seat open for the Opposition to grab. Let the games begin.
Our local history textbooks of the very distant future will say how Jack Warner was a somewhat good man but misunderstood by tens of millions worldwide, including Andrew Jennings, Camini Marajh and a several investigators. Jack would be compared to Robin Hood even though he never shot an arrow or stole from any one person. He would be portrayed in some books as an urban legend, a mythical figure who the skeptical skeptics would say, despite photographs, political speeches and audit reports, never existed. Such kindness and cunning could never lie in the heart of the same man, they would say. The books will present scores of photos showing Jack handing over cheque after cheque to delighted people who worshiped him as a God with money.
History will say he was a man known for his willingness to build box drains for the poor and downtrodden. The books will acknowledge that despite his many flaws and law suits, he would eternally be known for his ability to listen to the problems of the frustrated on a weekly basis and act appropriately, unlike the other Members of Parliament who rose to legendary dignitary status after winning an election. Jack Warner will be known as a man who did some right but no wrong locally.
Like all urban legends, Jack will linger on minds of both the mindful and mindless. His parting would be seen to be an aborted reentry by his friends and backstabbers alike since the Prime Minister could no longer fake ignorance of one man’s deeds twice in one term.
An interview with Mr. Warner which never happened:
Reporter: Mr. Warner, will you now be resigning from Cabinet?
Mr. Warner:Resign! Resign? Based on what? Some foolish report that ain’t even worth the paper it was written on. Resign! Yuh mad or what. Any Tom, Dick and David could produce a report and all yuh tripping all over alluh self with it. I tell you, I never hear so much foolishness in all my life. All yuh gullible yes. Anybody see me thief any money? All yuh have it on CCTV? No, but all yuh saying Jack thief this and Jack thief dat. Mark my word, one day the truth will come out and it wouldn’t be nice. Mark my Word! Everybody after Jack. What it is I do all yuh so. Anybody see me thief ah property? Dey have it on YouTube? Nobody see me tief ah dam thing but all yuh saying I is a smart man. Not one single solitary soul see me thief but dey saying I must resign. Dey go have to goe before me. Mark my word. I never hear anything so foolish in any country before. If is mih back all yuh want to see ah goe take off mih shirt yuh knoe. Look, I have nothing more to say only to say one day the truth will come out and it wouldn’t be nice, Mark my word. Ah gone, ah have to take care of the crime in de country. Laterz!
UPDATE: Jack Warner has finally resigned from cabinet. I wonder if any other resignations by JW are in store?
The Easter Blackout of 2013 will go down in Trinidad and Tobago’s history as the most exciting thing to happen to this country since the attempted coup of 1990. It is rumored that this 8, 10, 12 hour electricity blackout was accidental and in no way the work of a defeated and humiliated but powerful and highly moral union or the disgruntled and eager-for-power opposition.
The massive outage happened some minutes after midnight on the start of the long Easter weekend and seemed more than a coincidence at first. With the aid of cell phones connected to the social media via cell sites running on backup batteries and the mauvais lang nature of Trinis, the extent of the outage was propagated among the population in a short time. Not only was the extent of the outage and what might have caused it known instantly but who meat was spoiling and how much mosquitoes was attacking who and where.
It was during this blackout that people had time to reflect on something other than Jack Warner and realize how dependent on electricity and Protox we have become. It was however very unfortunate that few realized how much nicer the country looked under the moonlight as compared to the pollution of street lights. This incident showed how easy it probably still is to shut the country down and that storming a Parliament full of idiots by another set of idiots will do very little to terrify the nation again. All that is needed is one false alarm from a gas plant and away we go.