The WordPress.com stats helper monkeys prepared a 2011 annual report for this blog.
Here’s an excerpt:
London Olympic Stadium holds 80,000 people. This blog was viewed about 690,000 times in 2011. If it were competing at London Olympic Stadium, it would take about 9 sold-out events for that many people to see it.
In 2011, there were 57 new posts, growing the total archive of this blog to 713 posts. There were 189 pictures uploaded, taking up a total of 41mb. That’s about 4 pictures per week.
The busiest day of the year was August 27th with 8,271 views. The most popular post that day was Snooki Made Simpler.
Barack Obama might be the Blackberry President but aka_lol will soon be the Blackberry Blogger. The Blackberry is the productivity tool which will allow aka to replace doodling during meetings with blogging. With his Blackberry, aka will not only have access to email in real-time but he will now be able to impress women even when his batteries are low. The Bold is aka’s choice since it is a sleek device that is good to look at, nice to hold, and vibrates to get attention, much like aka. But the similarity doesn’t end there as both the Blackberry and aka can be soothing and addictive.
Once again I, aka_lol, have been the subject of a vicious tag for reasons that should be obvious to those who know me , those who admire me, and those who have expressed great indifference to my very existence and blog. After much deliberation and forgetfulness I decided to respond to the tag from Girlblue because my charm, cunning, occasional intelligence, and boundless humility prevents me from doing otherwise. Here is my list of over twenty interesting and/or little know things about me:
- Believes the camera is the best macocious device ever invented
- Is a music lover – all styles, all genres, all countries of origin, all peer to peer sources
- Is an animal lover except for snakes even though their tongues are the envy of every man
- Lucky number is 69
- Once had to adopt the crash landing position on a flight
- Never lost luggage or missed a flight
- Been to Portugal once
- Never ate sushi and doesn’t need oysters
- Doesn’t want to be envied or admired out of bed
- Loves to be physically active
- Never had a love affair with alcohol or fruit cake
- Loves being misunderstood
- Is misunderstood
- Never swears unless driving and even then in a very muffled and unintelligible voice.
- Once applied for sainthood but had my application rejected during the first evaluation stage when a $100 bill was discovered cleverly stapled to the back of the application form
- Thinks more problems can be solved with sarcasm than compassion
- Thinks the world will be a peaceful place when there is nothing to die for
- Would much prefer to see through women’s clothes that see through women
- Loves the ambiguity of the spoken word e.g. “She wanted to get ahead”
- Is hardly ever serious
- Can be forgetful
There is nothing wrong with sexy girls and guys or pictures of them and we, as unfortunate as it might first appear to the easily offended, live in a world driven by sexy. Cover girls and guys are always sexy. They may not always be slim but they are always sexy. Expensive cars are designed with sexy in mind with the sports car being the first alternative to sex invented, closely followed by marriage. With the exception of science magazines the brain is never used on the front cover. Photos of the butt at every angle have sold more beer, jeans, Slim Fast and dumbbells than photos of that collection of 100 billion neurons ever did. Sexy and the quest for sexiness, either by becoming or observing, is the underlying motivator of our brains. To deny sexiness exist, and its expression necessary, is to deny life itself.
So, should blogs be sexy? Yes, but only if you want to get them noticed. But getting a couple hundred visits per day or a dozen comments per post doesn’t mean anything if the blogger doesn’t feel the post is important. I enjoy reading some of my most unpopular blog post the most because it was meaningful to me and the honest expression of my life – yes they might be cryptic to some. We should not blog for attention but for our need for expression. What people write is important but what they imply is even more important. I don’t mean to say that blogs should be pornographic in nature and its writing and content vulgar. I feel pornography is for the depraved and the deprived, and possibly the married. Sexiness, on the other hand, is for those who live and see life as if alive.
Sexiness comes in subtle forms but vulgarity doesn’t. Sexiness is not only
the human form but the human form of expression. Sexiness is bold and daring. Sexiness can be shy but only when the shyness is confident. Sexiness is happiness that pleases the mind in such a way it causes the heart to beat even a fraction faster and the eyes to open a millimeter more. Great painters didn’t always paint sexy pictures of nudes but they also painted sexy pictures of landscapes where the viewer felt alive with that mild but tingly urge to reproduce.
A sexy blog post can contain the description of a mysterious sound in the blogger’s ceiling or even this post. Sexy, as I pointed out before, is how people express their aliveness. Sexiness is not a bad word but a great and natural feeling.
Preface to the Introduction
I decided to write this post because I didn’t know what else to write and I felt I should write something. It’s these voices next to my head.
This Beach Called Life – The aka_lol’s Blog was imported from Blogger into WordPress just over one year ago and I think it was a good year for the blog compared to a bad year. It was a good year, and not just for visits, but for poor grammar, disjointed paragraphs, and nonsensical post. As you may not have realized there is no theme for this blog other what goes on in my mind and keyboard. I am not nuts but some say insanity becomes me. Despite my self-proclaimed sanity, sometimes this blog goes crazy and attracts many visitors who become speechless on entry. Nevertheless, it’s nice when the visits go up on my stat counter and I am always curious to know what brought visitors here.
The Actual Superficial Content
This blog has been visited 27,826 times since July 16th, 2007. The most amount of visitors in one day occurred on February 7th, 2007 with 641 visits because of Carnival. More recently, the peak of 428 on the 17th July was due to the Trinidad Storm entry, Halle Berry and The Happening. Carla Bruni has been some help in keeping the stats above 100 per day and Everything You Wanted to Know About Aka has become popular and I think I figured out the glitch that made it so. Bikini Carnival continues to plod along but barely.
Friends of this Blog
I would like to thank those who commented and I would also like to thank those who commented more even more. You know who you are. The Blogroll on the side bar has a list of good bloggers who may have commented and some who are the silent type. Don’t be afraid to say what’s on your mind but just remember I offend easily.
One day I hope to sell the movie rights to this blog and finally make aka_lol a pronounceable household word.
There is no end in sight.
“Three Donkeys Escaped Unhurt” That was the headline in the local newspaper. Aka and the three donkeys escaped, mostly uninjured when they skidded off a modest cliff whilst negotiating a perilous curve. How this happened remains a mystery since Aka had years of experience negotiating dangerous curves with donkeys, or was it, donkeys with dangerous curves. Anyhow, he vividly remembered the horrific scene with donkey after donkey falling and braying as it plummeted, not unlike what was seen on the seven o’clock news. It didn’t trouble Aka that he wasn’t mentioned in the article in the local daily because he knew in some countries donkeys were considered more valuable than people. However, in Aka’s country, donkeys and people were becoming indistinguishable. Aka thought this was proof of the theory As a man thinketh in his heart so is he.
The beach had once again become Aka’s guru and he had much to learn from it. At the beach, his thoughts flowed freely but what flowed wasn’t always impressive. Some thoughts weren’t even publishable in his blog. Other thoughts made no apparent sense but they made him chuckle all the same, such thoughts as “all birds have wings but not all have feathers” and “probably university graduates are cool because they are one or two degrees above zero.” Only Aka, and a few of his similarly disturbed friends, would snicker at such thoughts. The inappropriate “wisdom” flowed and usually when it was least expected, or needed. The beach had taught Aka that in life the word meaning had no meaning. This sounded profoundly philosophical but he didn’t understand what it meant. The beach also had a sense of humor.
Aka preferred the beach when it was not polluted with people, coolers and brightly off-colored beach mats. Still, there were times when being distracted by people was most welcomed. The people he meant usually came fitted with bikinis but unfortunately, none ever came without. Aka realized that over time, he was seeing less and less of bikinis but this didn’t disturb him in a negative way. Though philosophical by nature Aka managed to see the humor in most things, even if only for a moment. Maybe he was happy and that was the reason he could see the funny side of things, but Aka thought the converse was true, it was his humor, though misguided at times, which brought him happiness. The bikinis didn’t hurt either.
Brevior saltare cum deformibus mulieribus est vita :)