Provocative angles and overall sexiness is a sign of life
Despite hundreds of thousands of dollars from the usual sources pumped into the by-election campaign, the ruling party lost by a margin that makes huge look small. As the results started to come in just after eight last night, loud screams of pleasure could be heard throughout the country as it became apparent that Mr. Warner was beating the U.N.C along with their arrogance, vindictiveness and dignitaries to a proverbial pulp. Though the majority of citizens were not entitled to vote in the by-election they were satisfied that the people in power (PIP) was being taught the lesson they refused to learn over the last few years.
A very embarrassed and slightly tipsy P.M. has blamed her election loss on the the abundance of those flashing blue lights on her dignitaries’ Prados. She theorized that those blue lights had a negative effect on voters in the Chaguanas West constituency causing them to see green instead of yellow at the polling stations. She however thanked family and friends appointed in those select positions for all their loyal support. The P.M. was also high in praise for the party’s many loyal contractors for their donations which were used to prop up failing newspapers rather than feed the poor or buy blankets for the homeless. “Serve the contractors, serve the contractors, serve the contractors” she was heard to mutter in between sips.
Random Thought 1
A vote for Jack is really a vote against Kamla.
Random Thought 2
If Jack were to win the Chaguanas West by-election the newspaper headlines would read something like – Jack the Giant Slayer – Chaguanas West Goes Green – Jack Makes Kamla Turn Green With Envy.
Random thought 3
If Kamla were to win the headlines might read – Jack Falls Down So Kamla Holds On To Crown
Random Thought 4
For the many Green supporters in Trinidad and Tobago Jack, despite his reputed international affairs with money, is seen as more honest than the Kamla cabal. Before the Peoples Partnership got into power Jack was the moral and financial backbone of the party. Now that many contracts have been awarded and many of the select contractors paid, Jack’s money is now frowned upon by those who once were in love with it and slept with it nightly. Jack is no longer needed to fund the UNC’s twelve full-page, full-color, please-please-please-vote-for-me ads in the Newsday on Sunday 28th July. To the majority of supporters of the PP, Kamla and company, after the unexpected big election victory, gave the spoils of the land to a small handful of financiers, completely forgetting why the country voted against the Manning regime. Despite the outcome of the Chaguanas West by-election Kamla and Company must understand that a large section of their supporters are extremely dissatisfied with their performance and they are seen as vindictive, greedy, dishonest, and self-serving. The Kamla-led UNC cabal is seen as no different to Manning and his madness and probably are even worse.
Despite all the learned talk, the Chaguanas West by-elections is not about good governance since the average citizen of this country has no idea what that means or care to Google it. The successful candidate in this election, aka voters’ choice, will be the person who the majority wants to be in charge of their most primal need, the need for proper box drains. We are a country, despite possessing valuable natural resources for decades, are still dreaming of having big box drains in our communities with water flowing so fast that it will have no time to turn green or mine fish. What voters have come to realize is that whenever Parliament meets it is to decide, after all is said and done, how proper box drains will be distributed throughout the country.
We as a country complain publicly about the high crime rate, Clico and HCU thieves, corrupt people in government, low IQ people in the media and stray bullets in our living room since those are the things every living human must complain about in the open. However, those public concerns are not our real concerns as we realize they are like bachac, impossible to get rid of safely. For citizens of this country our box drain life is like our sex life in that we don’t talk about it publicly unless it is damn good.
In choosing a box drain leader, the people of Chaguanas West will have to go with their guts. We all know that Jack, the owner and CEO of the Independent Liberal Party’s (ILP), has listened to more box drain woes from citizens of this blessed land than any person on the planet. Because of his compassion for the box-drain-challenged, Jack is considered by many to be the foremost box drain authority in the country and probably the entire universe. I am not sure how much Kadija, the United National Congress (UNC) candidate, actually knows about box drains but she has been campaigning in the area with the Prime Minister, giving out gift boxes which might be symbolic of both future box drains and empty promises inside. Avinash, the Peoples National Movement (PNM)’s candidate, is a farmer and because of his party’s track record may prefer to build an aluminum smelter or church with state funds. Regardless of the victor in these elections there will be fireworks on the night the results are known with the country being the biggest loser.
According to the Ministry of Health’s website:
17. Does the Tobacco Control Act really prohibit advertising? Under which circumstances is advertising of tobacco products allowed?
Indeed, the Tobacco Control Act has placed prohibitions against advertising.
There are, however, some limitations to the prohibitions:
A person may advertise a tobacco product by information advertising or brand preference advertising by way of:
a. A publication that is provided by mail and addressed to an adult smoker who is identified by name.
b. A publication that has an adult readership of not less than eighty –five per cent (85%)
c. Signs in a place where children (under 18 years) are not permitted by law.
Please note that these allowances do not apply to lifestyle advertising* or advertising that could be construed on reasonable grounds to be appealing to children.
The loophole which the eager-for-revenue local newspaper people might use in carrying this cigarette ad is that children don’t read much anymore and children see newspapers as a legacy product waiting to become extinct.
I, an adult by age, was drawn to this ad and my initial reaction was “so cheap.” No doubt this latest salvo by a clever company had more than the bland informational effect it was supposed to theoretically have. I almost had the urge to run down to the nearest dealer and start my addiction while I still had a few extra dollars. Though cigarettes are at the top of the list of addictions that will quite likely kill you in several ways, so to does alcohol, fried chicken, corn curls, cell phones, fast cars, promiscuous shapely women and political parties.
I don’t think this cigarette newspaper ad was necessary and it was in very poor taste. All that was needed was the dealers carry a pamphlet with the new prices which informs the addicted why they are paying more for their own tragic demise. Why should the nonsmoker also have to know about the latest price increase while being tempted to look cool with minty breath? Greed for increased profits at the expense of human life is usually the answer.
Jack Warner is hoping to be selected as the candidate for the now vacant Chaguanas West seat as a UNC member. This seat was made vacant by Mr. Warner himself as a reputable report was released worldwide stating Mr. Warner was less than honest in his financial football dealings over the years. The Prime Mister, unable to ignore credible evidence for a change, finally expressed shock and horror which angered or embarrassed Jack into resigning. Nobody knows. This report has probably worked in his favor as now no one can say they think Jack Warner was a dishonest man.
From the full page ads and reports reaching this blog, Mr. Warner, like the UNC executives, will go down fighting. Jack has popularity among the poor and romantic as his weapon, and the UNC, it seems, has the ability to victimize anyone who is observed to be part of Jack’s motorcade and support. Both sides are wielding big sticks against each other with the end result favoring Jack over the pretentious but powerful. Jack’s secret weapon is well known and that is to go as an independent candidate thus leaving the seat open for the Opposition to grab. Let the games begin.