The Low IQ Killers

I am not worried about being mugged and beaten by Beetham bandits as much as I am worried about being maimed or killed by a tailgater with a blue light under his car. Trinidad and Tobago not only has a President who avoids real issues using boring language but one of the highest tailgater to sane driver ratios in the world.

People who tailgate are as useful to society as people who sell corn soup with red nail clippings and are considered the pseudo-cool of our generation.  The average tailgater is young, male, short and wears platform shoes to try to look like a real man. They are bullies who terrorize people on the road and even on pavements and jogging tracks. Most tailgaters also steal high-end office supplies like staplers, Pilot pens and photocopy machines to make ends meet. Tailgaters are insecure people who were ignored by their parents while evolving from baby to brain dead and now need a blue light and a noisy engine to be noticed. The average tailgater thinks the roar of their engines can compensate for their lack of charm and the shortness of their penises. All tailgaters have as much as 3 CXC passes and carry alias like “Bullet Hole” or “Hard Lee.”

It is bad enough to have thousands of illegal guns on the streets but with the brain dead growing faster than the Tucker Valley cucumbers, tailgating will soon be the leading cause of gruesome death in the country.